Saturday, August 1, 2020

Lammas Greetings

I can't believe it is August 1st already. Lammas.  Lughnasadh.   The first harvest.  Super Fresh has blueberries on sale for $1.99. and I can't wait for tomorrow to get some.  This hasn't been a summer I care to remember, and to be honest, coming into the cooler weather kind of scares me.  We've been doing pretty good here with Covid despite all the protestors and young adults who insist on partying in the street without masks and with no social distancing.  I fear as the cooler weather sets in we might have a revival of the virus and that scares the heck out of me.  

I'm tired.  So tired of this new norm.  I want to be able to get up in the mornings and no I have a place to go.  I forgot what it's like to ride a bus.  Don't even know how much I have on my fare card.  It's been so long.  March 16th to be exact.  That's when they closed the center and everything else.  Shelter at home took effect and hubby and I took it seriously.  

These months have been a nightmare in so many ways.  The loss of my son in April, the problems with my niece, social isolation, depression.  We still haven't had the memorial for my son. The cemetery said that late August early September would be the best time for the service.  So I still haven't had that closure.  I still cry every day and miss him so much.  Just knowing he won't be with us for the holidays breaks my heart.  I loved him so and still do.  I talk to him all the time and set up this memorial for him.  I know he is with me.
He is surrounded by family, Mother Mary, and the Angels.  

I've said it many times.  I am so indebted to the center for getting me through this.  Food, online classes with peers, a grief counselor, all their phone calls making sure I am okay.  They were just what I needed.  

So, at this time of the first harvest, Lammas, a wondrous time of gratitude, I find myself overwhelmed with all the blessings that have been bestowed on me.  On April 7th, 2020 my world felt like it was ending, but through the loving kindness of others, of family, of online friends, my husband, I do have things to be grateful for.  My life has been blessed.
 

14 comments:

  1. Lammas Blessings to you, Mary, and may you find comfort.

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  2. Your son will be with you as long as you have your memories and carry him in your heart. Take care, Mary.

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    1. Thank you, Pam. Sometimes it just doesn't seem real.

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  3. Despite the worst, we find ways to get thru, but we never get over. New York is doing OK now so I hope you will be able to have your precious son’s memorial soon.

    Bless you, dear Mary.

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    1. We should be able to have it soon, hopefully. We're looking towards late August.

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  4. Lammas blessings to you dearest Mary.
    May Mother Mary bring you comfort and peace in your time of sorrow.

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    1. Thank you, Ellie. She always brings me comfort.

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  5. I am so very glad to see a post from you again. I worried. And glad that in your grief and pain you have found some support and comfort.
    Huge and gentle hugs.

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    1. Thank you. It has been so difficult because we are so isolated from each other.

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  6. Happy Lammas, We are in some strange time or should say different times. Glad to see you back

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