Wishing all of you mothers out there a very Happy Mother's Day. The weather here is so fall-like today...cold and windy. The heat actually came up for awhile this morning. My youngest called me and my eldest gave me the nicest card and of course, a Barnes & Noble giftcard. They know what I like.
Mother's Day is always rather bittersweet day for me. I am so blessed with my two loving sons who never forget me, but 'I' have no one to call on this special day. I miss my grandma and my mom so much. I'd always been so close to my grandma and was devastated by the loss of this loving woman when I was 17 years old. And my mom? Gosh, I hope she knows how much I love and miss her. For so many years ours was such an antagonistic relationship. She'd always seemed so resentful of me, and I never tried to find out why. Instead, I held a grudge for many years....oh, if I could only take things back.
As I grew older and started to look within; some say I was facing my shadow; others called in 'inner child' work...but I learned to understand just WHY my mom was like she was, that in her own way, she had to have loved me to stay with a man she literally despised for the sake of the child...rather than be wed to the love of her life. She gave up so much for me; I only wish that she had trusted me enough when she was alive, that we could have ironed out our difficulties. Mom, you are truly loved, and on this special day, I honor you. So, mom, grandma, I know you are both still with me. Happy Mother's Day. I love and miss you both. And to all the other ladies' in my ancestral tree. Thank you for giving me life.
And to all my friends in blogland, thank you all for being my friends. May you all have a wonderful joyous day.
I've noticed as I've grown older that many holidays and things turn out to be bittersweet that I never expected to be. I guess that's just the passage of time and the accumulation of experience. Gee, who knew?
ReplyDeleteBeautiful thoughts Mary. You've reminded me that although my grandmother and adopted grandmother are no longer with me, I can still honour them on this day. I think I'll get some flowers for my altar and send some messages to them.
ReplyDeleteSo happy you were remembered and gifted too!
Happy Mothers Day
ReplyDelete~mary...this is all to a bittersweet day for me as well...i long to be with my grandmother...so many words left unspoken and thought i would love to hear now...i do have my mother and it wasn't until i became a mother di dwe actually start building a relationship...i for many years had very hard feelings against her and really for nonsense reasons...thank you for sharing this with us...i think as each day comes forth there is always something we can learn and take within us...i do hope your evening is filled with much l♥ve within you...i do believe they can hear us...and they know and feel your affection...gone but not forgotten...a beautiful way to honor our dear ones...happy mothers day mary...brightest blessings~
ReplyDeleteI still miss my Nan so much too.. I will never forget the day she died.. I felt like part of me had died as well..
ReplyDeletemy mum is still alive and I love her alot but we have an odd relationship.. *sigh*.. it is something that i have to work through.. whodda thought that we would spend so much time in this lifetime sorting out issues like this?
sending my love to you dear Mary xo