Friday, January 29, 2010

January 2010 Full Moon

Good afternoon on this brutally cold day.  Amazing, isn't it?  Last week we had a touch of spring; this week we're taking a trip to the Arctic.  Strange winter, indeed.  Yet, even though winter still has flexed its control over the land, there are still those telltale signs that we are moving closer to spring.   I remember that last month when I arrived home at 5pm, it was dark, but now the daylight is beginning to linger for awhile longer, and the dark doesn't set in until I am in my home.   In winters of long ago, this was a time when our ancestors lived indoors and when finding food hard to come by.  The nights were long and darkness was all around, but it is also at this time of the year that our ancestors began planning for the coming of the new season.  It was a time to look forward to spring and the new life that comes with it.  

This is the first lunar cycle of 2010.    To the Native Americans, the name given to this moon is the  "Wolf Moon".   To the Celts, this lunar  is called the "Rowan Moon"  This full moon is known as the "Wolf Moon" but has also been called the "Ice Moon" or the "Old Moon".  Full moon names started with the Native Americans in order to keep track of the seasons. The names actually also applied to the entire month in which each occurred; hence, we are in a Wolf Moon month.  This name is derived from the wolf packs who used to howl just outside the villages during the hungry, lean, snow-covered winter months. Ironically, January is the first month of the new year, but it actually falls in the midst of the winter season...a period of death and isolation.  For us, it is a time for introspection, for going inside and reflecting on oneself...and searching ourselves for the answers to our problems.  It is also a time for both person and ritual observance.  Tonight's full moon will be the biggest and brightest full moon    

And on a different subject, when I was in my twenties and married to my abusive ex, I began writing plays.  Writing has always been healing for me, and I have always loved to create things, so it was only natural that I would gravitate towards some sort of creative writing.   My ex was an actor, and that never really interested me...not a camera person.  But writing, that was something I loved, so I began writing little plays loosely based on my life.  Then, after buying "The Writer's Handbook" I began sending my plays out.  You can imagine my surprise when I received a letter from an older man in the New Orleans area.  He was the publisher of one of these little magazines that featured new writers...and he had published my play in his latest copy.  And, not only did he publish my play, but he also talked about always being on the lookout for new talent.  In the year that followed, we corresponded often, and he became a mentor to me.  

But, my ex was jealous.  He was so afraid that I would become a success, and he wouldn't that he did everything he could to jeopardize my work.  As soon as I would sit down to write, he would sit across from me and either begin singing at the top of his lungs...or picking a fight with me.  And then came the letter from "The Manhattan Theatre Club."  This was a small theatre which only opened to a lunch crowd.  It was a famous place in those days and to have a play produced there meant you were "in".  I had sent them a synopsis of my play, and they had written back saying they found the synopsis intriguing and asked me to send the play.  I was so, so excited.  I went running through the house screaming with joy and called everyone to tell them the news....and everyone was happy for me...except for the ex who grumbled, "I don't know what you're so happy about.  They didn't buy the play yet."  To me, it was the same as him getting all excited when he was called for an audition.  He hadn't been chosen yet, but still it was a big thing to him.

Well, to make a long story short, my ex was so miserable and actually angry about my letter.  He actually fought with me over it telling me that the only reason I was writing plays was because "I WAS JEALOUS OF HIM."  It went on and on and on with him yelling that I was a nobody, that he was a star.  And like a fool, I allowed him to get to me.  I was so upset that I wasn't paying attention to what I was doing and instead of sending the final copy of the play, I sent out the rough draft.  Of course, I was turned down...and I never wrote again. 


  1. Now that you've long since freed yourself from The Dream Squelcher, do you ever get the urge to try your hand at writing plays again? Or is it still a tender area for you?

  2. so glad mary that you are free now... stay warm this weekend

  3. You stay warm, too, Mother Moon. Yes, Debra I have thought about it and there might be another play one day. I've experienced so much since then.

  4. *hugs you gently* Thou art Goddess. I can't describe the feeling in the pit of my stomach reading this. I'm sorry you ever had to bear his burdens like this, even though it was a long time ago.

  5. ~you are writing now and you are a truly beautiful strong woman to be where you are did not give up but continued on...words can be so cruel and abusive...brightest blessings~

  6. You know I believe our talents are there for a reason. Writing is a talent of yours. It is obvious by all your wonderful blogs. Hope your Rowan Moon was a beautiful one!