Friday Roundup

 Live in rooms full of light
Avoid heavy food
Be moderate in the drinking of wine
Take massage, baths, exercise, and gymnastics
Fight insomnia with gentle rocking or the sound of running water
Change surroundings and take long journeys
Strictly avoid frightening ideas
Indulge in cheerful conversation and amusements
Listen to music.

A. Cornelius Celsus

Good morning, everyone.  Another weekend has ended, and what a week it was.  I end this week feeling good about myself...which is always a good way to start the weekend.  I am making some positive changes in my life.

To begin with, I have become a bit disillusioned with the senior center I have been attending.  Their current activity list is next to nothing, and I am tired of playing bingo for an hour every morning and then sitting around chatting for the next hour.  The woman's group has become so boring that I no longer want to attend.  The food, once delicious, is now bland and is either served overcooked or undercooked.  It has been busy this month, but that is because lunch has been a quarter.  Next week, when prices go up, many faces will be noticeably missing.

One of the interns did start an art group on Wednesday.  Actually, the center didn't invest anything in it.  The intern purchased all of the colored pencils and stencils to color in.  I really enjoyed this group.

And the regulars there have gotten so used to the place that they don't realizes that there is something better out there.  Whenever I mention that I wish they'd have more activities, they respond. "Oh, we have more to do here than anyplace else."  And someone like me, newly retired, believes them...until someone comes along and opens up my eyes that there is so much more out there.  So, after attending my first Weight Watcher's meeting, I walked over to the senior center located nearby and found myself immediately enamored and anxious to attend.

A typical Monday at the center I attend is bingo, playing cards, or dancing in the morning. At 11 it is either a boring group, playing cards, dancing, or watching 'The Price is Right'.  Such exciting activities.  I never stay in the afternoon because it is the same thing every day...dancing or playing cards. A Monday schedule in the new place includes strength and flexibility, arthritis exercises, and art class...which includes 'beginning acrylic painting'.  On other days they offer wellness group, jewelry making, board games, health presentations, etc.  And the food?  How does stir fry beef or jerk chicken sound to you?

In all fairness to the center, a lot of the lack of activities has to do with the people who attend.  They'd rather play cards or dance all day.  On the few times they brought in an outside nutritionist to teach us about eating for high blood pressure, they played cards and chatted away while she was trying to teach.  Only a small handful of us, and I mean small, paid attention to what she was saying.  The others were so totally rude.  

Speaking of food, I absolutely LOVED Weight Watchers and cannot wait for the next meeting.  I realized once the meeting began that I cannot do this alone.  Food has definitely become an addiction for me.  In fact, I couldn't stop the tears when I got on the scale.  223 pounds. No wonder I lose my breath and have problems putting my socks on.

This was dinner last night.  I made some chicken in a low sodium red sauce  and filled my plate with salad.  I'll have to let the rice and beans go until I get some of this weight off.

So, there you have it.  I'd say this was a good week for me, and when I raised my hand in the meeting and said, "Hi, my name is Mary and this is my first time here. I came because it is time to take control of my life," followed by the applause, I knew I had made some right decisions.

Wishing you all a wonderful weekend.  See you on Monday.

The Journey Home By Willy Nywening

After reading "The Autumn of Her Life" I thought it would be a good long time before I found any fiction to hold my interest, but then I discovered "The Journey Home" by Willy Nywening is just that book.  I started following the FB page because I love the awesome feel goos quotes shared on there. Eventually I bought the book, and loved every page of it.  

The book is about a brother and sister who have been orphaned and focuses the struggles they have to remain a family unit and the  disappointments they face in life and how through the power of love, they were able to overcome them. From what I understand the inspiration for the book was her father who had been orphaned at a young age.  It's wonderful, wonderful, wonderful. Such a feel good story, and in a world of violence, war, and pain, we need more stories like this.
 
From the book's description...

Our childhood is an intricate part of who we become as adults. Everyone has difficulty, despair and disappointment in their past. How we choose to overcome these challenges determines the course of our lives. Through it all, love has the potential to heal old wounds.

In a time when children were meant to be seen and not heard, young lives were not always honored. Jamie and Martha, a brother and sister who were tragically orphaned at a young age, find themselves shuffled between family and friends. Stripped of their voices and choices, they endure heartbreaking circumstances that no child should ever experience. Even though disappointment seems to be the only constant in their young lives, they struggle courageously to find bits and pieces of happiness in a world that is often cruel and spiteful.

Through it all, something pure and innocent within the children refuses to die. On their journey, they learn one of life’s most important and powerful lessons: the healing power of love makes life – and living – possible. While love cannot change the past, it is the key to redeeming an unwritten future. For Martha and Jamie, it is love that creates the true refuge that is home.

Tuesday Ramble

 
Don't dig your grave with your own knife and fork. 

English Proverb

 A photo I took of the super moon last night.  It's not much, but  a normal moon would just be a wee dot on the picture.  

 

Good thing I got it when I did because this is what happened to it a few minutes later.

The house next door looks terrible.  They really should paint the outside, especially since they are selling it for 2 million dollars.  The inside is gorgeous.

Happy Tuesday everyone.  Had a great day off yesterday.  Got my meds and had a wonderful time  ploughing through the 99 cent store.  Good morning, everyone.  Well,  I boycotted the center yesterday as I said I would.  I am aware that I accomplished nothing by my absence which meant nothing to staff, but it made me feel like I was doing something.  And I did accomplish something.  I picked up my prescriptions, bought a window and shower curtain and rug in fall colors for my bathroom, and picked up the ingredients needed for my chicken stew.

My chicken stew last night was fantastic.  Ingredients included chicken legs, carrots, one tomato, potatoes, turnips, parsnips, string beans, onions, garlic, celery, Mrs. Dash's extra spicy to give it an extra kick, and sodium free chicken broth thickened with corn starch.  Topped it off with a slice of avocado.  Great dinner for Harvest Moon Night.  Dessert was blueberries with a dollop of light Cool Whip.

According to numerology, September is a 7/7 month.

September, 2014 = 9 + 2 + 0 + 1 + 4 = 16 = 7

2014 is a 7 Universal year

This mean September should be all about bringing balance into your life.  It is a time to create healthy new habits and to let go of those that no longer serve you.  Seems appropriate.  After last night's 'letting go' ritual I am looking forward to moving on to a healthier new lifestyle beginning with a new workshop I will be starting this Wednesday. 'Better Choices, Better Health Arthritis' is a 6 week workshop that will focus on diet, exercise, and stress reduction.  By the time I have completed I will have an action plan in place.  It's time that I take an active stance on my health before it spirals completely out of control.

I've also taken the intiative to set up my first session at Weight Watchers. I'm obese.  There, I've said it.  When I walk past a mirror or a store window, I don't like the reflection of the woman I have become.  How did this happen?  Better yet, how did I let this happen?  I remember a friend telling me that she was so jealous of me because I had a perfect figure.  That was 20 years ago, and I kept myself in shape up until about 6 years ago, then started allowing myself to go to pot.  My downward spiral actually began when I stopped smoking and started eating instead.  I didn't know how to stop. 

When I was working, I was actually doing much better than I am in retirement.  Although my day focused on computer work, I was constantly up and down walking to the front desk, copy machine, or just looking for an office to meet with a client.  I was always on the move.  I try my darnedest to get out and about every day, but when you don't HAVE to go to work, it's easy to find excuses to stay home.  And then it becomes a vicious cycle.  The more you sit and do nothing, the more you begin to hurt when you try to walk.  And the more your hurt, the less you want to walk. That is all going to end now. This is a promise I have made to myself.

Monday This and That

 As long as the world shall last there will be wrongs, and if no man objected and no man rebelled, those wrongs would last forever. 

Clarence Darrow

Good morning everyone.  Hard to believe it's Monday again.  Seems time is moving faster now that I retired.  I had a quiet weekend.  Did my food shopping on Friday and went to Church on Sunday.  On Saturday I started out, but the humidity got to me before I reached the corner, so I turned around and headed right back indoors. It's nice out today and the humidity is low so I plan to get out and do something.  First, I do have to go to Pathmark for my prescriptions and then I think I'll shop for some new fall decorations.  I love buying something new to add to my collection each year.

Not going to the Center today.  To be honest, if it weren't for the friends I made there and the little responsibilities I have there, I think I would find somewhere else to go. I see quite a bit of unfairness and favoritism there, and that doesn't sit well with me.  When I see unfairness, I get frustrated.

However, the reason behind today's boycott is not the fault of staff at the Center...or perhaps it may be.

Each year the Brooklyn assemblyman throws a senior picnic at the Army base in Brooklyn.  It's a beautiful area with picnic benches, trees, and a wonderful view of the bay. I really wanted to go.  However, only a certain amount of tickets is allotted to each Center so not everyone gets to go, which I understand.  Our Center chooses to raffle them off.  We all sign our names on a slip of paper and they are place in a huge jar. Whoever's name is drawn gets to go.  Which is fair, and I have no disagreement with that practice, and if I lose, then I lose.  I accept that. 

What happens, though, is that people who NEVER attend the Center show up just to be a part of the raffle, and once the names are drawn, they disappear until the next raffle is held.  In fact, I overheard two ladies talking about how many Centers they have their name in and what they were going to do with the extra tickets if they should win in more than one place...and it didn't include refusing them.  They were going to make sure that ALL their friends got to go.  Unfortunately, all these extra names in the raffle make it harder and pretty much impossible for many of us regulars  to win. 

So, once again the names were drawn, and many people who we had never seen before won the coveted tickets. We are NOT happy campers. There must be something the Center can do to make it a little more fair their loyal clients. Perhaps it would take a bit more time, but look on the sign in sheets to see who does attend before allowing them to sign.   This makes two years in a row that I cannot go because a non-attendee has taken a spot.  I don't mind losing if it is a fair loss, if I saw my peers win, but they don't win either...and there was a lot of grumbling going on on Thursday. So, today is the picnic, and I guess you could say  staying home is my little way of protesting.  I know it means nothing to them, but it makes me feel as if I am doing something.

   

This weekend I used up the last of my floral scented candles. It's time now for the autumn scents of cloves, cinnamon, spiced apples, vanilla, blueberry cobbler, and pumpkin pie. Always brings me back to the time of innocence of youth. Grandma loved making her pies.  She didn't bake cookies or cakes, but she sure made some delicious pies.  

Tonight is the Harvest Moon. The Harvest Moon is the first full moon closest to the autumnal equinox, and is sometimes known as the Hunter's Moon,  Corn Moon, and the Barley Moon.  The menu I have planned for tonight includes a hearty chicken stew with  carrots, turnips, onions and potatoes, salad and seasoned rice on the  and a slice of apple pie.  Maybe I will even live dangerously and add a dollop of ice cream.

I found the following little ritual for letting go to share with you.  I posted it last year, but thought it was worth a repeat.  It has appeared on a few sites, and I have no idea of it's origin.  It calls for some Autumn leaves, but that doesn't seem too promising here.  Our leaves or mostly still green.  Maybe I will find something in the park. 

Find some autumn leaves, and mark on each one a symbol to represent what has been weighing on you.(for example a dollar sign for money issues). Meditate and focus on the issue, then burn or bury the leave to symbolize the release of all it represents. This ritual can be very liberating!" 

Friday Roundup

Good morning and a very happy Friday to everyone.  It's been a strange week weatherwise.  Just when I am preparing for fall, illusive summer appears.  It's been absolutely dreadful out there, but at least the end is in sight.  Monday is supposed to be a cool down day. Let's hope they are right. 

I did some exploring on Facebook and discovered there's more to it than I once realized.  It's a haven for genealogists, and I have joined several groups.  I was especially glad to find some groups related to Irish and German genealogy, and through and the Irish genealogy group I stumbled across Keating Genealogy and joined.  My great grandmother came from Ireland, and I have really been at a loss in finding any information on her prior to her coming to the US.  She'd become one of my 'brick walls', and I'd come to terms with the fact that I may never know about her. 

On both Irish genealogy groups I met some wonderful people who steered me in the right direction.  This week I managed to trace my great grandmother to Clogheen, Tipperay, Ireland.  I now  know the names of her parents, Alice and William, as well as her siblings, Ellen, Mary, Daniel, and Bridget.  I also had quite a shock waiting for me. Something I never expect.  My GG grandfather listed his occupation as 'Traveller', basically another word for 'gypsy'. I'd always questioned why my year old great  grandmother would venture to America, alone.  She had the wanderlust of her family.  And perhaps this is where my independent spirit comes from.

I also joined a group totally dedicated to Christmas--arts and crafts, decorating, recipes. Already have save some fabulous recipes.  I absolutely love it, but in joining its sister Christmas card group I think I bit off more than I can chew. In the age of computers and high price of stamps, the Christmas cards we receive each year have dwindled down to almost nothing.  I miss the old days and the thrill of receiving cards in the mail so I thought it would be fun to join a group where we sent Christmas cards to each other. Little did I know that almost 200 people were going to sign up for it.  Guess I'd better get started now.

Well, I guess that's about it for this week.  I lead such an exciting life, don't I?  Here's hoping that you all have a wonderful weekend.  See you on Monday.

You Can Bring a Horse to Water but you can't Make him Drink

The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing. 

John Powell

I am fit to be tied right about now. You all know the story of my god daughter and the abusive man she had living with her.   Well, at the present time he's sitting in jail, and hopefully he will be there for a good long while.  Turns out that not only was he physically and emotionally abusing my niece, but he was also sexually molesting her 9 year old daughter.  A real sicko he was. Hope he rots in prison.  And one could only hope that after a string of bad relationships, with this one being the worst, my niece would learn her lesson.

So, in the past two months since she turned him into the police, I've spent a lot of time talking to her and trying to help her build her self-esteem.  One thing I have stressed over and over again was the importance of spending some time alone, without a man, that she needed  time to heal before jumping back in the game. The healing process should never be rushed.  She should take all the time she needs.  Having been raised by a cold, unloving mother, and no father in the picture,  she attracts the same type of brutal, abusive men over and over again.  I suggested that it might be a good idea for her to seek out some professional  counseling for herself and especially for her daughter.   To jump into a new romantic relations right away means that she is not working through the things that have happened. 

Well, she 'yessed' me to death.  " Don't worry. I'm taking time," she says.

"So why do I see this budding relationship on Facebook?" I ask.  

"Oh, I am not in a relationship with him.  I know better. He knows I need time to heal.  He is just a friend."   

"Where did you meet him?" I ask.   

Her response, "on Facebook."  ON FACEBOOK.  She met her last man on Facebook. Has she learned nothing?

Obviously she hasn't, because despite all her denials, I checked out her  Facebook page last night and  the first thing I see is this man posing with all her children.  Her comment.  "I love this man.  He opens doors for me, he's good with my kids, and he goes to Church every Sunday. Never been happier in my life."  My gosh, it hasn't even been two months yet.  Doesn't she realize that it is only natural that a man is on his  best behavior in the beginning?   I'm not saying that there aren't good men out there, but given her track record, I'd be willing to bet this isn't the one. 

I can't quite put my finger on it, but there  is something about this man that is not kosher. He gives me the shivers when I look at him.   For several weeks now, I have checked out his homepage, and he has been professing his love for her.  Now suddenly, his home page has become ultra private.  Of course, that is not reason enough to dislike him, but my intuition is telling me that I'd best keep close watch on things.  I don't want that little girl getting hurt again.

So for now I remain silent and watch.  Fortunately, my niece is very open and not shy about telling all on Facebook so if anything should happen, I'll know.  And this is a promise I make right now.  If I get any inkling that that child, or any of her other children, are being hurt, I will be the first one to turn her in. 

Thanks for listening.

The Autumn of Her Years

Every now and then a book comes along that I just cannot put down.  'The Autumn of Her Years' by Kathleen Kubik  is such a book.  I guess maybe it was because I saw a lot of myself in the heroine, Martha Scanlon.  The book deals with the pain of the loss of a first love (something we can all identify with), an unhappy marriage, the overwhelming love one feels when they finally find their soul mate, coming to terms with the loss of your love, and eventually moving back to where your life began and starting over.  One thing I would like to say.   I love the way the book ties everything together. One finds closure at the end.  No loose ends.

This is one book I didn't want to end. I know it would be awhile before I found anything to even come close to how this book was.  It's such a beautiful book.  I highly recommend it.

Synopsis

Never forget your dreams. Sometimes they get lost in the shuffle of everyday life. Don't let that happen to you. Love, heartbreak, and hope find a home in Kathleen Kubik's decades-spanning novel, The Autumn of Her Years. 

As a naive seventeen-year-old in 1959, Martha Scanlon's summer romance with an older boy brings her the joy and heartache of first love. 

Five years later, twenty-two-year -old Martha unearths family secrets that make her determined to live without regrets.

But by 1972, Martha finds herself trapped in her biggest regret of all: an unhappy marriage. Her decision to divorce threatens to tear her family apart, but Martha tries to find consolation in her new life in California. 

As 1981 dawns, thirty-nine-year-old Martha meets a man who may finally offer the love she thought was beyond her reach.  
 
Returning to New York in 2006, Martha finds comfort in the security of her reconciled family as she struggles to come to terms with the new life she must create for herself.
 
But when a special person makes an unexpected entrance back into her life, Martha slowly begins to realize that a woman may come of age at any age.