Monday, January 17, 2022

Monday Morning and I'm Itching to Get Out

Good morning.  What a storm last night!!!  Woke me out of a sound sleep.  Started as snow in early evening, but as the night wore on the temperature went up and it changed to rain.  It was the wind that got me.  50 miles an hour.   The whistling sounded like a major blizzard. Funny thing, ever since that building next door went up, the whistling has been extra loud.  You would think it would block the wind and the cold, but it actually has made it worse.  It's almost as if the wind funnels its way down.

Speaking of that monstrosity next door.  It's not completed yet, and I wonder if it ever will be.  It stands 8 stories tall but the front is not finished nor the inside.  They've had a number of partial stop work orders, and now since December 23rd they've had a full stop work order.  Kind of makes me nervous about something that tall standing next to me having all those safety issues.

This has been the view out of my kitchen window for over a year now.  Wish I could afford to move, but right now that's out of the question.

I'm so excited to get back to the center tomorrow.  I've already laid out my clothes and packed my bag.  When they first re-opened we weren't allowed to bring in any cups from outside, but people were bringing in a thermos filled with water.  So I ordered one from Amazon, stop at the store to have it filled with  iced coffee, and enjoy my drink for the rest of the day. 

We now have a rock painting class at the center.

I am really not very good at it, but I do have fun doing it.  

I know I haven't mentioned my niece/goddaughter who stole my son's money.  Well, I just didn't have it in me to go back and forth to the DA in Queens so she got away with it, but I did turn her into the IRS for stealing his stimulus check.  Never heard what happened about it, but she has since moved to Florida.  I have blocked her on all my sites and my phone, but I understand she still carries on about how good she was to my son.  Yeah, right he paid all her bills and watched her kids.  But enough of that. My stomach tightens when I talk about the evil one.

Friday, January 14, 2022

Christmas, Better Late than Never

Good afternoon.  Great news.  I tested negative this morning.  Whew!!!!  I can finally return to the center next week. I'm really going stir crazy about now.  It's been a long two weeks.  Been missing my peers even though I have seen several of them on zoom.  It's just not the same as being out there and socializing.  Gosh, I am so thrilled.  I was dancing around the room.  Been trying to learn that TikTok challenge dance so that gave me a good chance to practice....with hubby looking at me like I was crazy of course.   

We didn't have our Christmas Eve feast this year.  My son had Omicron and was in quarantine until the 26th. So on Christmas day, hubby and I went to spend some time with Anthony.

It was a dreary gray day, but before we left a miracle happened.  The sun came out so brightly and shined down on his grave.

This was the second time this happened.  The first was on Thanksgiving when my son Jerry and I visited.  I swear the son shined brighter than I had ever seen it, it's rays falling on Ant's grave.   It was blinding.  You couldn't even look in that direction.

I swear that was Ant letting us know he was there.

I didn't want to have the party on Sunday since the next day was an early day for me so we celebrated Christmas and New Year's together.  This year we had an Italian feast:

Caprese Chicken from Pasquale Sciarappa.  So yummy.

Meatballs and sausage with my special sauce.

Shrimp scampi for hubby.

Two pans of baked ziti.

Cheese, crackers and pepperoni.

Buffalo wings.

Chocolate cake for dessert.
My son and I.  I continue shrinking.  Now down to 5'1".  The incredible shrinking woman.
My adult coloring class.  That's me in the dark blue seater.

The center didn't have a Christmas party this year so we had our own in the last class of the year.

Question for you.  I keep getting an add to join the Google Web Creators Community.  What's that?  Has anybody joined?

Thursday, January 13, 2022

Please Accept my Apology

 Hi, it's me.  So sorry to have disappeared for so long.  Life just got in the way.  So many things have happened since I was last here.  To begin with, hubby and I are just getting over Covid.  For two years we managed to avoid it, but Omicron caught up with us.  Fortunately, I was just boosted in late November and had a fairly mild case....although Saturday into Sunday was a nightmare...but that seemed to be my peak and each day I've felt better and better.  Hope everyone is doing well as this nightmare continues. 

Last I spoke to you we were getting ready to bury my son.  It was a lovely outdoor service because indoor services were not allowed at the time.  There was only a few of us in attendance due to Covid restrictions, and my son streamed the service for those who could not attend.  

This photo of my son at the grave brings tears to my eyes.  

In June my daughter married an Elvis impersonator she met on some Christian website.  

My son who is ordained married them.

She has become very distant since then along with the rest of the family.  She hasn't called me in over two years and only checked on me twice via Facebook during my battle with Covid.  My grandchildren never even acknowledged that I was sick.  I've been very depressed over the whole thing.  I don't know if you remember how happy and excited I was when we connected with each other again.  I was so looking forward to my second chance, but it seems that they never really meant anything they had said.  I've decided that this year I'm going to move on and they can move on with their lives as they choose.  I can't allow them to hurt me anymore.  

The center offered online zoom classes throughout the year and I found myself busier than I was when it was open.  It  re-opened in September 2021 and up until my Covid bout I have been one of their regulars.  I now teach Jewelry making and run an adult coloring group.  More on this at another time.

This is me now.  I keep my hair very short...wash and wear....and no longer color aside from a silver shampoo.  I've put on a great deal of weight and am now struggling to lose it.  I did re-join Weight Watchers but became very frustrated when I had to pay full price for zoom meetings, plus they keep changing their plans rather than leave well enough alone.

Well, that's about it for now.   I just touched on things here.  More in-depth stuff to come.  I may not post every day, but I will do my best to get a couple days a week in.  

Again I am so sorry if I worried any of you.  

Tuesday, October 27, 2020

Tuesday Catch Up

Sorry I haven't been checking in, but it's been a hectic week.  That and I am suffering once again from that shoulder pain which kept me from the computer last year.  That's the main reason I haven't been here.  It hurts too much.

On Friday I paid the rest of the money for the funeral.  However,
when the sales rep charged me the rest of the money for Ant's funeral she added in the overtime amount that occurs whenever you hold a funeral service  there after 11:30 on a Saturday. Then when she went to the office they told her, no, that she could not charge the overtime fee ahead of time, that I have to pay that in person on the day of the funeral. So the sales rep then voided the first transaction and charged me again minus the overtime fees. Well, to make a long story short, both are showing up as pending in my bank account. And it's quite a large amount. Must give it a few days to see if it posts (according to TD bank). Otherwise, if I choose to go in before it posts,  I would have to pay $30 for an investigation. If I wait til it posts then it will cost me nothing but the headache. Have to go to the bank anyway on Saturday so I guess I will take care of it then. I mean, do I really need all this extra stress in my life right now? Fortunately I saved the email she sent explaining the mistake and her voiding the charge.  

Picked up my son's ashes on Sunday.  He is home.  Old wounds have re-opened.  I think until I set the urn on the shelf I was able to live in some sort of denial.  This has made it real. I also had the funeral director put some ashes in an urn necklace I bought and two urn crosses--one for my son and the other for the woman my son loved from the time he was five years old.

I am pretty angry with my doctor.  He is refusing to refill my BP medication until I come in for my 6 month check up.  He did give me a 10 day supply and he didn't realize it was early so I still had almost 3 weeks.  I am angry because I told them my son had passed and I was planning the funeral, that I needed some time to grieve, and promised that after the funeral on November 7th, I would make an appointment.  He just doesn't care.  I even got a letter from him in the mail "Please make your appointment ASAP".  I understand my health is important, but aside from HBP and chronic pain, I'm healthy.  This appointment could wait a couple of weeks.  It's all about the money.  Since Covid they haven't been seeing patients, and making money, like they used to.  I just think they are being heartless right now.  Even thought of finding another doctor.

I am continuing with my regular class and taking a few elsewhere.  Dropped out of the writing course because my heart wasn't in it right now.  I couldn't concentrate like they wanted me to.  This week there has been a series of telesummits on FB that I have been attending.  So perfect for the week of Sanhaim--The Samhain Spirit Summit.  It's been great and I am learn quite a bit about folk magic. Yesterday there was talk about Iceland, and I learned things about the Vikings and ancient ancestors that I hadn't know.  

I don't know if I ever mentioned, when people ask me what my ethic background is I always say English, Irish, German, and Dutch.  That is what I believed until I received an update result of my DNA test.  Turns out I am 45 percent England and Western Europe, 30 percent Scottish, 14 percent Germanic Europe, 5 percent Swedish, 3 percent Wales, only 2 percent Irish, and Icelandic.  It was total surprise for me.  Now I am brushing up on Scottish history and foods.

Have a wonderful day.

Tuesday, October 20, 2020

Tuesday Ramble

There has been so much going on lately.  The funeral, classes, etc.  Last week I was interviewed by the mayor's office.  The center referred me.  I was asked about my involvement with online classes and how they have helped me.  I was also asked my advice on how they can improve.  It seems the city is planning on expanding the services to other centers and hoping to get other seniors involved as well.  The Dept. of Aging wants to give some classes as well.  They were especially interested in the grief class I took and thought it was great that participants came from different parts of the world.  

I was also interviewed by the nurse interns, not once, but twice.  The first time lasted 2 hours.  And then they requested to speak to me again, but I was interviewed by two different nurses the second time.  They have been giving some great classes.  Today will focus on high blood pressure, but it's not looking like I'll make it.  I've not even showered or had breakfast yet. Wish they didn't do it so early.

I found that I missed those city meals even though they weren't the best.  I missed the box of canned goods, cereals and stuff they used to send.  I also missed the chicken.  I used to take the thighs and add some spice and cook them up for hubby.  (I don't like thighs). But I used to like to take the chicken strips and make a nice stir fry out of them.  So I rejoined.  But, what I got has been pretty disappointing.  

This is supposed to be Chicken Ragu, but all I see is egg noodles, a little sauce and mixed veggies.

Chicken Basil Potstickers.  There are only two of them and mixed veggies.  I figured I will stir fry some chicken and broccoli I bought yesterday.  I don't know if I will eat the ragu.  Doesn't even smell appetizing.  And forget the three sandwiches.  I tossed them away.  I mean whoever heard of purple turkey?

This was only my first delivery and I'm signed up for two weeks.  We'll see what the next delivery brings.  I may just end up canceling. 

My son and I decided we want to keep some of Ant's ashes to keep him close to us so I ordered the following:

This is for my son, Jerry.

And this is what I bought for me.  At first I just couldn't bear to think of it, but now I realize that it will be a way to keep him with me always.  

I forgot to mention yesterday.  The plot I bought is for two, so that will be where I am laid to rest as well.   

Thanks everyone for your response to my question yesterday.  Finally got it across to hubby, and he understands.  My son and I are both going to chip in.  One of my friends who knew Anthony from 5 years old is already talking about appetizers for the table.  Well, I looked at the prices.  Not really in my budget.  She and her hubby are invited as well as their daughter who loved and was loved by my son.  They had once made a promise to each other that one day they would be married.

Monday, October 19, 2020

Monday Catch Up

Gosh, it has been a full week since I have been here.  I have been so busy that I hadn't even realized so much time has gone by.  I've been planning my son's funeral.  On Monday I purchased the plot.  

To get there you have to cross a small pond filled with fish.

I chose to have his plot under the tree.  He will be buried near where the woman is standing.

I also purchased the urn.

And the eulogy cards. 

I ended up with two because the one didn't have his picture.

I ordered this cross for his grave.  It's a small plot so big flower arrangements are out.

And finally, I the guest book. 

My hubby's sister is going to come with the deacon and they will give the service.  It hasn't been easy, made all the harder by Covid restrictions.  There will be no inside service so we will all gather around the site.  No more than 15 people can come so my son is going to livestream for those others who can't.  

Now I am focusing on where we can go to eat afterwards.  Not easy.  Must find a place with outdoor dining and parking. I'm leaning towards a place called Spumoni Gardens which brings me to this question.  I'd planned on ordering a Sicilian pie for each table.  That's what they specialize in.  Dinners there are pricey and not very big.  Then I will have a few small appetizers on the table and the drinks.  That shouldn't run me any more than $200.  Now here is my question.  I believe that it's the families responsibility to pay for this.  Hubby says no,  everyone should pay for their own, that that's the way it is done.  I need some help in this.


Monday, October 12, 2020

Monday This and That

As Monday rolls around again, I'd like wish you all a wonderful week.  I know it's not easy lately, but we have to make the best of it.  That's all we can do.  We were talking about it in Friday's group.  This is certainly not what I expected from my golden years.  After working 50 years, I was finally having fun, and abruptly on March 12th, that ended when the city closed down.  The center most likely will not open until next year.  But, I am thankful for my online classes.  They are getting me through all this pain and heartache.

I had canceled the food from the city about 3 weeks ago and now have re-ordered it.  We are in the orange zone, and I don't want to take any chances.  Don't want to be running around anymore than I have to, and to be honest, those meals weren't the best, but I am feeling it in the pocket.  I didn't eat the entire meal they sent, but I did take the chicken and make it into something delicious.  Plus, they also send a couple of boxes of food.  The box is filled with things like pasta, canned fruits and veggies, cereal, snacks, etc.  That I am really missing.

The other day I had  a dream about an old co-worker only, we were all on a different job and I was a newbie there. She was retiring and everyone had bought her a gift. Funny thing was, everyone bought her a vase. She had all different kinds. I felt bad because I hadn't known about it so I dug in my purse and found some cash, not much, but enough for a gift. I was walking around looking for a store. Everything that was open was restaurants. Finally I wondered into this open air restaurant and in the back they had gifts. Picked up a beautiful white vase with purple flowers on it, but put it down because I wanted to get something different. That's when I woke up. I was trying to go back to sleep to finish the dream so I could see what I bought for her. I will never know what I chose.

The biggest news is this.   We are finally going to bury my son.  Life insurance finally paid off and tomorrow I have to call for prices and steps needed to make it happen.   I've already made a list of things that I have to buy and things I have to do.  I feel so much more at peace now that I can finally lay him to rest and the manner I always wanted.  He deserves the best and he is going to have the best that I can afford.  I love him and miss him so darn much.  Why does this have to be?  Why, instead of planning the holidays do I have to plan my son's funeral?  My heart is broken.

Have a wonderful day.