Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Post of Truth 7.... Someone Who has Made My Life Worth Living

I have learned silence from the talkative,
tolerance from the intolerant
and kindness from the unkind.
I should not be ungrateful to those teachers. 
~ Kahlil Gibran
 My logical answer would be hubby and my two wonderful sons...and, of course, they have definitely made my life worth living, but for this truth,  I wanted to share about someone else, someone from my past who was always there for me when no one else was.  Yes,  my beloved grandmother had always been there for me...and yes, she did make my life worth living, but today is about  someone else...a beloved teacher, Mr. Ferguson.

In school, I was that child who stood on the sidelines, the child who was not a part of.  It wasn't always that way, but in  a short span of time, my grammar school years went from one of fun, games, and acceptance to one of endless taunting.  School had become a nightmare for me.  I had  always been a 'shy' child, but i also had a circle of friends who had been with me since kindergarten...but somehow they all ended up in another classroom while I ended up in a class with the cousin from hell,  a kid  with a  mean streak mile long...a cousin I had never even met until that year when he and his family moved into the neighborhood.  I'll never know why, and  guess I shouldn't really care.  We lost contact over 40 years ago.  There is one  part of me that wants to believe the best people that says he was difficult for him leaving his friends and moving to a new place.  Perhaps he just didn't know how to fit in, and the only way he could feel like he WAS somebody was to belittle someone else...someone too shy and weak to defend herself. Perhaps it was really was just as hard on him as it was on me. Who knows?  And why should I still care?

Because teasing is belittling, hurtful, and demeaning.  When you are the object of the teasing, you  feel like no one likes you, that you are friendless, unlikeable and that these feelings will last forever. And, when you are a shy child as I was, it drives you further into yourself.  Mean, hurtful words can and do follow you well into adulthood, hiding beneath the surface, continuing to mold who you have become....and they will continue to make you feel less than until one day you awaken to the beautiful, whole person that you really are...but I seem to have gotten off track here....

...Fortunately, I had Mr. Ferguson.  He'd always been one of the most beloved teachers in school, one who is not easily forgotten. he's gone now having been  at least in his 40's when he was teaching us, but what I remember is someone who didn't take sides.  He neither singled me out nor those who taunted me, but treated us all as one.  He saw past the straggly haired little girl who had no one to help her get ready for school, who never seemed to have it together because she had to take care of herself.  There is one day I remember as clear as if it just happened yesterday.  It was picture day, the day we were supposed to look our best.  We were all standing in a line waiting to sit for the photographer.  I was a mess.  That morning I had tried to put it in a ponytail, hadn't done a very good job of it; half of the tail was out and hanging straggly over my shoulders.   Mr. Ferguson came along, then called one of the female teachers to give all of 'us' girls a quick comb out.  He didn't single me out, but instead included all of us in the little tidying up effort...

....and so, Mr. Ferguson, here's to you.  55 years ago you made a little girl feel special,  and that little girl has never forgotten.  Know that in those times that I wanted to crawl into some corner and hide, you made me feel special.  You made a little girl's life worth living and for that, I will always hold you in my heart.

They may forget what you said,
but they will never forget how you made them feel.

Carl Buehner ~


  1. A beautiful story about a special teacher. He sounds like a very wise and loving man.

  2. what a wonderful story... I often think of others who touched me in earlier years and wonder if they ever knew just how special they were to us. You were blessed to have someone like that in your life. blessings

  3. I agree...a most beautiful sharing and one that has me with huge tears in my eyes. Thank You Mr. Ferguson for creating a special place for this wise and wonderful woman to feel good about herself. It truly is the mark of a wise and wonderful teacher!

    Thank You Mary for sharing a part of yourself that was so tender and sensitive...you never cease to amaze me.

    Blessed Be My Sister/Friend...

  4. Isn't it nice to have had these special people
    come into our lives .
    When I think of mine, I'm hoping they know the difference they made in my life.
    Even my great Nana Thomas who amongst many memories of her... filled my lungs with bath dusting powder. :0)
    pat..pat..a pat!
    A silent Thank You sent out to you all.

  5. Dearest Mary,
    Just dropping by to say hello. I am so glad you had such a teacher in your life. It's people such as Mr. Ferguson who help shape our lives and make this world a much better place.
    I hope you've enjoyed this autumn and that the holidays bring to you much bliss.

  6. What a beautiful person your Mr. Ferguson was. Sometimes I wonder if these special people that we have in our lives realize just how blessed we feel to have them.


  7. The world needs more Mr Ferguson's.

    ((HUGS))) to you.

    Love Leanne