Monday This and That

If your teeth are clenched and your fists are clenched, your lifespan is probably clenched. 

Terri Guillemets

Friday was a nightmare at work.  Made me realize just what I was giving up...a whole lot of stress that I don't need at this point of my life. I could literally 'feel' my blood pressure rising, and at one point, I started to cry. With the audit going on everyone was on pins and needles.  Clients seemed extra loud and annoying, but that's because we were so busy trying to play catch up.  Audit times are always like that, especially when they come as a total surprise, but it just made me realize just how much that job is affecting my health. Even the auditor said she doesn't see how any of us can get any work done. 

It's bad enough that we are sitting right out there in the open with no such thing as boundaries, but both of my bosses are so afraid of not keeping the numbers up that they baby the clients who are allowed to come in in the morning and do whatever they please.  While the stereo is blasting in one room, they put movies on in another, and not only do they talk to each other loudly, but they all stop and hang over your work space when you are trying to work.  Half of them are chatting on cell phones, some are dancing like they are in a club, and others are spilling coffee and cereal all over the place. (They get breakfast). And, there is no place to hide.  No door to close to get away from it all.  You are just 'there'.   I am so glad I am getting out of that madness.  9 days and counting.

There is a Duane Reade on my way to the subway, and on Friday as I headed home from work, a little boy was standing in the doorway crying screaming for his mother who was chatting on a cell phone a few feet away.  I kind of thought that he was just being belligerent, and she was just waiting it out, not wanting to give into one of his tantrums.  But then, the little boy ran up to her screaming "But, mama, I want to pay for this," and he held up a small yellow bus.  Did the mother tell him to go put the toy back?  No.  Did she give him money to go pay for it?  No.  Instead, she took his hand and walked off with him. How awful, I thought.  She was teaching her young son that it was okay to steal.  What happens when he grows up?  Is he going to be one of those teenagers who just takes what he wants because 'mama' taught him it was okay?  

Saturday, the weather was fantastic in the morning, so I left the house about 8:45 before all the heat hit.  Went to the bank in my old neighborhood, and it felt it as soon as I got off the bus.  There is a dark aura in that neighborhood. I used to think it was just the house I lived in, but I wasn't near that house,l  and still I felt it. It is the people there--the those patriarchal men with their better than attitude, the cat and squirrel killers, the children who steal from the poor, run away laughing, and then look at you like you've got some dreadful disease, the taunting of dogs and cats, need I say more?  I couldn't wait to get my banking done and get away. 

I wish I could close this bank account and reopen it elsewhere, but that is not that easy.   It is an estate account, and all I can deposit there are beneficiary checks.  So, if I close it, the cash I receive will not be able to be deposited to start another estate account; I'd have to start all over again.  Then, there is so much paperwork to provide.  It's just not worth the bother.  And, it's not as if I have to be there every week.  It's usually once every 3 to 6 months.  I guess I can bear it.

Afterwards, I headed straight to my favorite shopping site and found two pair of the shorts I have been looking so hard for, two nightgowns (hubby shrunk the ones I had in the drier), and a summer/winter purse (good for all seasons).  I bought some of the fillers for the miniature fairy gardens I hope to build.  Already my creative juices are beginning to flow again. 

Meanwhile I have signed up for both Feedly and Bloglovin.  Not sure yet which is best.  After all, this is the first day. But, by golly, I am going to be sure not to lose any one of you in this Google overhaul. 

These are some of the river rocks and shells, and ocean plants that I purchased for my seaside terranium. I also hope to intersperse some real sand and small plants as well.  I've found some wonderful little fairy figurines and furniture at Amazon that I have yet to order.  Wondering if anyone here has some advice where I can send my craft needs at a decent price.

No matter how old you get, if you can keep the
desire to be creative, you're keeping the child inside alive.

John Cassavetes