The Day Before

Consider the trees which allow the birds to perch and fly away without either inviting them to stay or desiring them never to depart. If your heart can be

like this, you will be near to the way. 

Zen Buddhist teaching

Good morning on this rainy day. Hopefully, it will call it down like they say it should.  Something has to give. 

Well, tomorrow is it...my big day...the day that one world ends for me and another begins.  How do I feel?  Both exhilarated and sad. Saying good-bye to the job doesn't phase me at all, but saying good-bye to people, now that's a different story. All week as clients bid their final farewells, it just didn't seem possible that I would never see them again.  

I am also aware that both the clients and staff have something planned.  I can't help it.  I'm nosey.  I've heard clients talking of something special for Friday group, and on Tuesday, when I went into the file room,  I saw a list on the office manager's desk. Of course I had to look. Turned out to be some of the foods my co-workers were bringing to my retirement  party----ribs, buffalo wings, homemade chicken lo mien, macaroni and cheese, fruit salad, sausage and peppers, chocolate cake.  Yummy!!!  Forget my diet tomorrow.  I'll just try a little bit of everything.

Hubby will be picking me up.  I hate making him come to the city.  The last time he picked me up it took us two hours to get home what with all the traffic.  I've not that much to carry.  All my little stuffed critters will be given away, each to a member of staff.  My books, I am leaving.  No need for these books anymore.  I'm not planning to work in the field again.  But, there will be little gifts and perhaps some of the extra food so it will be nice to be picked up. 

Well, it's time to get a move on.  Have to stop on the way in to get some blood drawn.  Forgot I had an appointment with the endo on Monday.  (It doesn't end)  I wonder if they will all be so anxious to see me when I am on Medicare.  See  you tomorrow.

Once we see that everything is impermanent and ungraspable

and that we create a huge amount of suffering if we are

attached to things staying the same, we realize that

relaxing and letting go is a wiser way to live. Letting

go does not mean not caring about things. It means

caring about them in a flexible and wise way.

Jack Kornfield