I've learned that things change, people change, and it doesn't mean you forget the past or try to cover it up. It simply means that you move on and treasure the memories. Letting go doesn't mean giving up. It means accepting that some things weren't meant to be.
It was kind of rough at work yesterday...emotionally. I'm not only finding it harder to break the news that I am leaving, but, although I had expected strong reactions from 'certain' clients, I hadn't expected it in just about all of them. It has taken me by surprise. So far I am about halfway through my caseload, and male and female have become teary-eyed when I told them...and, of course, when someone becomes emotional it sets me off, so tears came to my eyes as well. I guess that is the week I have in store for myself.
I can't keep putting it off. I realized this morning that by the time I take off the three days for the biopsy and the 4 sick days I have left, it's less than three weeks, and the 'employee' part of my life will be over, and the 'retiree' will take over. This week I have to let everyone know. So, I've been pulling each client aside to tell them personally and asking them to keep it under wraps until I have a chance to tell everyone. I don't want them finding out second-hand news. That's not nice. I know how I would feel if it was done to me, but I also know that some clients find it hard to keep a secret, so it is only a matter of time before they all know.
It was really strange yesterday when I went online and found my job posting. A year ago, I never would have thought of it, but many things have changed since then, and the decision had to be made. One of my co-workers who doesn't want me to go was angry and said, "They could have waited a week or so. It doesn't seem right when you are still here." I understand, though, and I told her so. We're already so overburdened, they need to fill my space quickly.
What a mess that rain storm brought with it on Friday. We had nearly five inches of rain. It rained so much that a small crack on the building wall has now become a huge gaping crack and water has been seeping in. It not drenched my bedroom curtains, but now my bedroom ceiling is about to come down. And then, with more rain coming yesterday and more rain on Thursday, I am just keeping my fingers crossed. They say they will be here on the first dry day--Wednesday. I'm really very angry about this. They've known about this problem since November. Actually, they had come to fix it back then, but it seems that all they did was put a band-aid on it. Now, it has become a major issue. I learned a long time ago that if you don't fix something right, it only becomes a bigger problem in the future. The whole ceiling will probably have to be redone now. I can understand this happening to someone on the top floor, but on the first floor? Who would have guessed? This is what my ceiling looks like now.
In closing, I'd like to share a couple of the wonderful good-bye quotes I found. I'll be sharing them off and on until I leave the job.
Good bye may seem forever. Farewell is like the end, but in my heart is the memory and there you will always be.
How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.