Monday This and That (Warning. It Turns Into a Rant)

Sometimes, the problems you must face are more than you wish to cope with, and tomorrow doesn't seem to offer any solutions.  You may ask yourself "Why me?" but the answer is sometimes unclear.  You may even tend to feel that life hasn't been just or fair to burden you with such obstacles.  The roads any of us choose to follow are never free of bumps or curves, but eventually the turns lead to a smoother path ahead.  Believe in yourself and your dreams.  You will soon realize that the future holds many promises for you.  Remember. . . difficult times don't last forever.

Geri Danks

Weekend is over and another work week is set to begin.  Didn't do much at all this weekend.  Hit the fruit stand and Rite Aid for some needed items, but forget shopping for myself. That's  on hold for the time being.  It always seems that just when we begin to get ahead, something happens to knock us back down again.  Here I was, beginning to seriously think aboutmy retirement plans, and now life throws us another whammy.  Hubby's employment benefits have been cut off. According to the records, hubby's unemployment has run out.  It shouldn't have, he should be able to collect until January, but his balance says 'zero'. 

In addition, they closed his food stamps because unemployment pays him too much. No notice.  No chance for appeal. Imagine that!!!  And forget Medicaid.  They say he is not eligible. What the heck? Social security disability is giving him the runaround. The man has a terminal liver disease and needs treatment, emphysema, and glaucoma. We've got a lawyer to fight it, but even they can't seem to light a fire 'under their butts'.  I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared.  I don't know if I can handle this all alone.  Living in New York is quite an expense, and moving, at this point, is out of the question.  Hubby needs to be near his doctors.

Out of suffering have emerged the

strongest souls; the most massive

characters are seared with scars.

Edwin H. Chapin

I am also very angry that it seems to me that we, who work all our lives and pay our dues are penalized while those that have never worked benefit from the monies taken for our salaries all these years. I've worked for fifty years and go to work in pain every day, yet I cannot quit because the monies I can collect from social security won't even pay my rent...and forget about social security disability.  If they tell a man with a terminal illness that he is 'able to work, what will they tell me? Yet, a 24 year old client of mine who has never worked a day in his life 'plays' that he is depressed and has everything is handed to him...$1600 in Social Security Supplemental Income and some other benefit he receives.  He only pays $400 rent, gets $200 food stamps, medicaid, and has everything handed to him.

Forgive me for saying this, but there is definitely something not quite right with the system. What the heck did hubby and I pay our dues for all our lives if we can't use it when we need it?  I don't support my grown sons, yet here I am at 65 years of age supporting someone else who is well able to go out and earn a living, but he chooses not to because the system makes it all too easy on him.  Makes me want to quit my job and find one that is 'off the books'.  After all, the money I am paying in to 'supposedly' benefit me is used instead to benefit drug dealers and criminals.  Yes, that's blunt, but I see it every day...and that is what has me so riled up.

Granted, I do understand that there are those out there who truly DO need help and have never worked, not because they don't want to, but because they are unable to. I see that everyday to. I have no qualms about that.  It's those who know how to 'work' the system and do so every chance they get that I have a problem with.  And what gripes me the most is that the system makes it so easy for them.

Meanwhile, I'd wanted to do some shopping for myself this weekend, but a heavy dose of reality has set in, and, at this point, I have no idea what the future will bring.  I do know this, though, hubby and I  have been through our troubles and tribulations before, and we have not only survived, but have grown stronger because of it. And THAT is going to be my focus during the upcoming weeks.  Thanks for letting me share today.

Unfortunately, all is not beauty and peace. I don't believe I've ever met

a person who hasn't been challenged or wounded by something. Difficulties

present choices: we can either waste away from our wounds or use them

to grow our souls. My husband, for example, is a survivor of the Second

World War. As a child, he suffered through six years of bombings, near-

escapes, and concentration camps. Part of his soul work has been the

gradual transformation of this deep well of grief and pain. As he heals

himself, he also participates in healing that terrible idea of war in others.

I have always said that no one heals alone--we heal through and for one another.

Joan Borysenko