Monday, October 22, 2012

Monday This and That (Warning. It Turns Into a Rant)

Sometimes, the problems you must face are more than you wish to cope with, and tomorrow doesn't seem to offer any solutions.  You may ask yourself "Why me?" but the answer is sometimes unclear.  You may even tend to feel that life hasn't been just or fair to burden you with such obstacles.  The roads any of us choose to follow are never free of bumps or curves, but eventually the turns lead to a smoother path ahead.  Believe in yourself and your dreams.  You will soon realize that the future holds many promises for you.  Remember. . . difficult times don't last forever.

Geri Danks

Weekend is over and another work week is set to begin.  Didn't do much at all this weekend.  Hit the fruit stand and Rite Aid for some needed items, but forget shopping for myself. That's  on hold for the time being.  It always seems that just when we begin to get ahead, something happens to knock us back down again.  Here I was, beginning to seriously think aboutmy retirement plans, and now life throws us another whammy.  Hubby's employment benefits have been cut off. According to the records, hubby's unemployment has run out.  It shouldn't have, he should be able to collect until January, but his balance says 'zero'

In addition, they closed his food stamps because unemployment pays him too much. No notice.  No chance for appeal. Imagine that!!!  And forget Medicaid.  They say he is not eligible. What the heck? Social security disability is giving him the runaround. The man has a terminal liver disease and needs treatment, emphysema, and glaucoma. We've got a lawyer to fight it, but even they can't seem to light a fire 'under their butts'.  I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared.  I don't know if I can handle this all alone.  Living in New York is quite an expense, and moving, at this point, is out of the question.  Hubby needs to be near his doctors.

Out of suffering have emerged the
strongest souls; the most massive
characters are seared with scars.

Edwin H. Chapin

I am also very angry that it seems to me that we, who work all our lives and pay our dues are penalized while those that have never worked benefit from the monies taken for our salaries all these years. I've worked for fifty years and go to work in pain every day, yet I cannot quit because the monies I can collect from social security won't even pay my rent...and forget about social security disability.  If they tell a man with a terminal illness that he is 'able to work, what will they tell me? Yet, a 24 year old client of mine who has never worked a day in his life 'plays' that he is depressed and has everything is handed to him...$1600 in Social Security Supplemental Income and some other benefit he receives.  He only pays $400 rent, gets $200 food stamps, medicaid, and has everything handed to him.

Forgive me for saying this, but there is definitely something not quite right with the system. What the heck did hubby and I pay our dues for all our lives if we can't use it when we need it?  I don't support my grown sons, yet here I am at 65 years of age supporting someone else who is well able to go out and earn a living, but he chooses not to because the system makes it all too easy on him.  Makes me want to quit my job and find one that is 'off the books'.  After all, the money I am paying in to 'supposedly' benefit me is used instead to benefit drug dealers and criminals.  Yes, that's blunt, but I see it every day...and that is what has me so riled up.

Granted, I do understand that there are those out there who truly DO need help and have never worked, not because they don't want to, but because they are unable to. I see that everyday to. I have no qualms about that.  It's those who know how to 'work' the system and do so every chance they get that I have a problem with.  And what gripes me the most is that the system makes it so easy for them.

Meanwhile, I'd wanted to do some shopping for myself this weekend, but a heavy dose of reality has set in, and, at this point, I have no idea what the future will bring.  I do know this, though, hubby and I  have been through our troubles and tribulations before, and we have not only survived, but have grown stronger because of it. And THAT is going to be my focus during the upcoming weeks.  Thanks for letting me share today.

Unfortunately, all is not beauty and peace. I don't believe I've ever met

a person who hasn't been challenged or wounded by something. Difficulties

present choices: we can either waste away from our wounds or use them

to grow our souls. My husband, for example, is a survivor of the Second

World War. As a child, he suffered through six years of bombings, near-
escapes, and concentration camps. Part of his soul work has been the
gradual transformation of this deep well of grief and pain. As he heals
himself, he also participates in healing that terrible idea of war in others.
I have always said that no one heals alone--we heal through and for one another.

Joan Borysenko


  1. YES! The "System" stinks. Those who work, pay for some who choose not to work, and know how to Play The System.

    And if BO is re-elected, it will only get WORSE. Because he is dedicated to this unfair Socialistic Way Of Life.

    If only people will open their eyes, and SEE!


  2. I hope things turn around soon in the financial department -- sending hugs and best wishes your way.

  3. Keeping you and hubby in my prayers Mary...
    I'm sorry you are having to go through this.
    I'd reapply for Food Stamps with you declaring Head of Household if hubby is not working. Just a thought...and keep calling your Attorney, bug them everyday if you have to as well as the Disability Office.
    Sending Up Prayers on the Smoke!

  4. You and your hubby are facing difficult challenges and choices. The entire country is in a state. I am hoping for some real changes soon. In the meantime, may you be led to some real help so that you don't have so much stress to deal with.

  5. I am just Speechless! Your lawyers are sitting on their butts??? You need to light their Fire Girl! Don't give up...In order to Do that, you need to fight fire With fire. Dump those morons AFTER you find a lawyer that Gives a damn. They're out there. The wheel that squeals the Loudest, gets the Oil first....
    You have GOT to get Mad! Geeez, I wish I were there to help...
    Oh, Auntie sent me....I'm glad she did!

  6. Oh Mary, it seems like life just keeps on giving it to us, (both the good and the bad) and you're experiencing a lot of the bad right now. I really admire your fighting spirit and this is what you'll need as you deal with the system. Sending you lots of blessings to you and hubby.

  7. So sorry to hear this latest turn of events. Somehow you will find assistance in this unjust situation. Try to keep your spirit up; There must be a solution. Wish I knew more about the "system" to offer concrete help.
    Hugs to you and your husband.

  8. Auntie sent me over... So sorry it really t's me off that hard working folks have to jump through hoops but lazy folks get it handed to them... Hope everyone remembers this at the polls

  9. Mary, I am sorry that your husband is having such difficulty getting disability. A good attorney can really help that process, but sometimes the reports from doctors/clinics slow things way down (that was our problem with my daughter's case), and you've got to stay on it -- or he does. We found that being the squeaky wheel helps.

    As far as the politics are concerned, you (and me) are part of the 47% that Romney scorns and tells to go to the ER if you're sick, or borrow money from your parents if you need help. If the Repubs get into office, ALL social welfare and disability programs are in dire jeopardy. We have seen how they have refused to approve the Equal Pay act and the Jobs for Vets act already.

    Hang in there, and tell hubby to check with his caseworker about food stamps again. The system is often slow and unwieldy, and you already know that, but you will get help eventually.

    Thinking of you...

  10. Hello!! I am so sorry for your situation! It is SO not fair! YOU, though, are AMAZING!! You are up and huffing and that's a GOOD thing!!! You RANT all you want! We are here to listen and support you!

    PS....'Auntie' sent me over and I am now your newest follower! I want to see how this will all work out! And it WILL work out! One way or another! You are a winner and will land on your feet!