Learning to Be Patient

No person can think clearly when
his or her fists are clenched.

George Jean Nathan

Oh my, let me tell you about patience.  Since Friday I've had to use every last ounce of it I have and now am feeling as if one more stressor comes my way, the pressure cooker within will burst.  To begin with,  I'd looked forward to this past three-day weekend for weeks; it was going to be a time of sleeping late and catching up on some much-needed rest.    Between the office move, the packing at home, the stress of looking for an apartment,  I surely needed it.

So, Saturday comes along, it's 7:30 am in the morning.  I lazily gaze over at the clock, stretch, and roll over in the hopes of catching a couple more hours.  Not meant to be.  Just as I was about to doze off, there was such a commotion in the hallway that I flew out of the bed.  The men were there to paint and lay tiles in the hallway, making the house look 'prettier' to sell. Now mind you, they were supposed to have begun on Tuesday, and the job would have already been finished, but they decided they were going to wait for the weekend to start.  Gee, thanks!!!!   Ironically, I had just said to hubby the night before "Watch, they probably waited for me to be home to do it."  A lesson learned...be careful what you say.  It just might come true.

So, to make long story short, they worked from about 8 am to 1 pm...and they did this on all three days of the weekend.  Grrrr!!!  Really wanted to let them have it, but really, what would have been accomplished?  Anger does nothing but destroy the angry person and all those around him or her. The guys were just doing their job.  How were they to know I had a special weekend planned for myself?  I ended up kissing my sleep good-bye and utilizing the extra time to do some packing...and really got a lot of it done. 

Fast forward to Tuesday morning.  I arrive at work at 8:20 and find clients already in the program and eating their breakfast.  No staff is on the premises.  The cleaning lady let them in.  What a huge 'no, no' that is.  Guess what happened when I mentioned it to the boss?  His reply was, "Maybe we will have to start opening a little earlier."   In the old place, clients were not allowed upstairs until 9 am.  Here it has been 8:30 am.  Now, he's talking about it being earlier.  We have clients who live in the building.  Perhaps we should start bringing our jammies and spend the night.  Didn't tell my boss what I was really thinking, that he spoils these clients too much.  Instead, I marched back to my desk and got out the Halloween decor I had bought over the weekend and had a great old time setting it up.

And, last, but not least, was speaking to my landlady last night.  Do you know what she said to me?  "Do you really want to move?  Because I don't want to sell."  Can you believe it?  I've been tormenting myself for weeks, packing, searching for a place, worrying about the future, and now she comes out with this?  "No, I really don't want to move," I responded, "but I honestly cannot keep going on with this seesaw...selling, not selling, etc.  I've already resigned myself to moving, and I just can't go back now.  We've already been told once that we can stay, only to have the rug pulled out from under us a few weeks later."   Before I hung up, I assured her that I won't leave her in a lurch, that once we find a place, we'll be sure to give her ample notice, but in my mind I was saying, "I refuse to be anyone's yo-yo anymore."

So, that is what has been going on with me.  Hmmm!!!  Wonder if these negative energies have something to do with the Aries Full Moon.  If it does, I think I channeled my anger very well.

The most extraordinary thing about the
oyster is this. Irritations get into its
shell. It does not like them. But when
it cannot get rid of them, it uses the
irritation to do the loveliest thing
an oyster ever has a chance to do.
If there are irritations in our lives
today, there is only one prescription:
make a pearl. It may have to be a pearl
of patience, but, anyhow, make a pearl.
And it takes faith and love to do it.

Harry Emerson Fosdick