For Sale

Taking a few minutes rest from my ultra-busy weekend to share the latest with you.  It's official now.  Yesterday they put a 'For Sale' sign on my house and are selling 'as is' which means it could go quickly....very quickly, so, for me, this weekend has been a race against time.  The house itself needs a lot of work, but the Hasidic people who will buy it will tear it down and rebuild, so the work doesn't matter.  They've rebuilt all the homes on this block.  Hubby says it is because they cannot live in a home that a Gentile lived in.  How true that is, I don't know.   

I have to say that I am looking forward to the move, a new start, but I'm scared and depressed right about now.  What if they sell before we find a place?  I keep asking my landlady "How long do I have?", and she keeps telling me what I want to hear, "Oh, it is not going to happen right away.  You can probably stay until December."  At 64, I've learned to read between the lines.  Of course, she will tell me that.  She stands to lose our rent when we leave.

This weekend I went through every item of clothing we own, those hanging in the closet, as well as those packed away.  I was ruthless.  Hubby left a short while ago with six lawn and leaf bags filled with shoes and clothing belonging to both of us.  Heck, I'll never be a size 10 again, and he will never be a 32 waist.  Why hold onto them?   In hubby's case, we gave away size 32, 34, and 36.  (He's a 40 now).  In my case, we gave away size 10, 12, 14, 16, and 18 as well as small, medium, large, and extra large.   

I began sorting through books and sent my son with three large shopping bags full for a friend of his who loves astrology and such.  I've taken things from the walls and heaved those that no longer serve a purpose.  I got on the small ladder and began cleaning out the top shelves of my kitchen cabinet which I always forget are there.  Heaved all that stuff out.  It' been non-stop all weekend.  And there is still so much more to do.  Hubby is going to bring me back some packing boxes so then I can begin packing the paintings we want to keep, knickknacks, and books that are keepers. 

There will be no more first floor, backyard, absentee landlords for us.  This enough.  As I can no longer care for a garden, a window garden will be it for me.  Hopefully I will have lots of windows and sunlit rooms, not this railroad style we have now where houses are attached, leaving no windows in the living room, dining room, and kitchen.  We also choose now to go into a building.  In a building you have rights.  Here, we are at our landlady's mercy.  

As I write this post, I am of mixed emotions, looking forward to a new start, but mourning the loss of the old.  My son reminded me last night that we moved here in February of 1997.  That means, this upcoming February will be 15 years.  That's a big chunk of my life, a big chunk of the 20 years I have had with hubby.  So many memories, so many...and now, as the tears begin to flow, I think it is time to take my leave.  Just wanted to let you know if I go missing, it's because I am busy, and that's all.

Thanks for being hear to listen.