Thursday, July 21, 2011

On Being Unique

I think everyone is unique. We know that. The only way you find out what you are
is by trying everything, and then at some point you take what you are, which
is unique. Don't ever try to mimic anybody, because you will only be second best.
You can never outshine the thing you are trying to mimic, so don't ever do that.
Don't idol worship. Finally, be yourself. Then you are going to be really unique and
exciting. People are going to beat a path to your door if you polish your inner self.

Robert D. Ballard

Yesterday a client asked me if I and my co-worker, Jane, were gypsies. I have to admit, we DO dress in what they would call a gypsy style...although I prefer to call it a hippie style.  For a moment, I was caught off guard, but then...

...I had to chuckle at his question.  'Why do you ask?'  He sort of put his head down now, obviously thinking he went too far asking staff a question like that.  'Because of the way the two of you dress.'  Another co-worker who had overheard told me she thought he had been pretty fresh.  'Why?' I asked.  He wasn't trying to be insulting.  He was making an honest observation and can't be faulted for that.' 

In fact, I was flattered that my uniqueness was noted.  I haven't been one to follow fashion or fad since my twenties when I discovered the hippie style of dress and stuck with it, in a modified version, of course.  I skipped the era leather minis and knee high boots and never got into punk.  No, my style has always been the long, crinkly peasant-style skirts, sandals in the summer and laced boots for the winter, colorful for every outfit, and flowers...I love putting a flower behind my ear.  Another staple of the hippie wardrobe is the scarf, and I've a huge bag of scarves in every color and style. 

Am I unique?  Yes, I would say that I am.   Am I happy with myself?  Indeed, yes.  I would like to take off a few pounds, well, more than a few (try 50) but I am happy the way I dress.  I have no desire to be like everyone conform so to speak.  I never have.  Sadly, all too often, we are so busy trying to be what other people want us to be that we forget that we are a self! We forget to be who we are...we forget to be who we were born to be....and in the long run, we become resentful because, along the way, we lost a part of ourselves.

There comes a time when you have to stand up and shout:
This is me damn it! I look the way I look, think the way I think,
feel the way I feel, love the way I love! I am a whole
complex package. Take me... or leave me. Accept me - or walk away!
Do not try to make me feel like less of a person, just because I don't
fit your idea of who I should be and don't try to change me
to fit your mold. If I need to change, I alone will make that decision.
When you are strong enough to love yourself 100%, good and bad--
you will be amazed at the opportunities that life presents you.

Stacey Charter


  1. You're a girl after my own heart Mary...I too dress to please myself and always have. I never cared much for fads. I just have always wanted to be comfortable.

    I'm glad you stuck up for the person questioning your clothing...sounds like he was shooting straight from the hip and I don't get the co-workers questioning of it. There's one in every crowd it seems.

    By the way...I love scarves and crinkly skirts too! He He He...

    Blessings Abundant...

  2. As Paracelsus wrote, "Be not another, if thou canst be thyself." Yay for individuality!

  3. Excellent reminder!

    Please... May we all be the person we choose! Not the one, who is dictated, by anyone or anything else.

  4. i now picture you with a flower behind your ear leaning over a crystal ball :)...i think it makes a nice picture

  5. and.....I like jeans and slacks and to wear dresess when I am at a better weight than I am right now. Personally I think that I am going through my second childhood because someone put skinny jeans in my closet...Guess who!
    I too dress for myself, not my age. :0)
    What is old age anyway????
    Been known to pick a flower and putting it behind my ear too. ;0)

  6. I have always liked people who seem unique and are outspoken.
    You always know where you stand with them.

    Although I must where a uniform in my line of work, I have always
    adored the hippie look of the seventies. Long flowing skirts and sundresses with flowers in your hair will never go out of style as far as I am concerned.

    Don't ever change we love you just the way you are.

  7. Thank you! I really needed to hear these words today!! Going out to celebrate myself!!

  8. Hi dear Mary...I loved this post. I just had a feeling you were a bohemian at heart.....My....I do think we must of been sisters in another life.

    Have finally landed in Montana....on solid tera contacting blogging buddies will be so much easier.

    Hugs friend,