Tuesday, July 19, 2011


To have a good friend is
one of the highest
delights of life;
to be a good friend is
one of the noblest and
most difficult undertakings.

Yesterday as I was typing up my notes at work, I couldn't help but overhear my office mate chatting away on the phone.  She and one of her friends were making plans for a party this upcoming weekend.  They were planning this for another friend whom they had gone to school with.  And, as soon as she hung up from that call , she picked up the phone and  immediately dialed someone else, and as I listened, pondered what it would be like to have that many friends as well.

I don't think I've had a 'really' close friend since early childhood, and in my entire life, I remember only one best friend.  We met when I was five years old.  My parents had recently bought our first home, and I was in my room feeling a bit resentful.  Up to that point we had lived with my grandparents, and I had really not wanted to move.  As a matter of fact, I gave everyone a hard time before the move and on the day of the move, but my miserable mood was soon to end.  It was summer, and I was in my room with the window open when suddenly I heard, "Little girl, little girl, can you come out to play?"

My spirits lifted I ran gleefully out to the back yard, and from that day until just before we entered high school, we were an inseparable pair.  Then, just like that, Kathy's parents decided they wanted to move to a new area.  Funny, now that I think of it, I wasn't as broken up by the news as I should have been.  I guess we'd already started going our separate ways.. She the bookworm, the smart kid of the class, the nerd...and I, I was the rebel who hated school, skipped class every chance I got, and ran with what I thought was the 'cool crowd'.  (Little did I know.) I spent one weekend at Kathy's new home, but was more interested in the boy down the block than I was in her.  That was the last time we saw each other.

And, as I grew older, I had acquaintances, but now, in my senior years, I realize there was no one I could call a friend...certainly no best friend I could share things with.  In fact, I learned quickly that if I didn't want my business out there for all to see, I should keep it to myself.  And that's what I did.  For many years I had no one to share with, no one to tell the things that I have been telling all of you.  Here I have felt comfortable opening up my heart and sharing the things that I've never been able to talk about. 

Although friendship may mean different things to different people, I believe it  is basically related to our human need to connect to others....and it doesn't matter how you connect, just so you connect.   I feel that this has happened here in the wonderful land of blogs.   I've not only been able to connect, but I have, in fact,  developed  some of the deepest friendships of my life have been with people I have never seen. 

Take my friend, Elizabeth.  We met on a Yahoo group, and immediately we clicked.  She was an only child as well, and we often called ourselves the sisters that we never had.  And a year and a half ago when she passed due to liver cancer, I mourned for her as if I had known her forever.  And this is the way I feel about  you.  When one of you suddenly disappears, I am fearful, and when I get word that one of  you is ill, I worry until I get word that you are okay. And when I see one of you who is not taking care of themselves, I feel comfortable getting on my bandwagon and nagging a wee bit.

Indeed, it is true that the foundations of a friendship can be built online just as easily as they can face to face, and in my case, even easier. I've always gotten along well with others, but have had difficulty cultivating friendships, because I have problems dealing with trust.  It's not like that here in Blogland.  Here I can say anything that I want, and no one will fault me.  No one will speak behind my back or try to belittle me.  

Just wanted to take the time to let you know just how much all of you  have touched my life and how important you are to me.  Thank you for being my friends.  I love you all.

No friendship can cross the path of our destiny without leaving some mark on it forever.

Francois Mauriac


  1. My Beautiful Sister/Friend Mary...
    It has been such a divine pleasure for me to get to know you over these past months. I look forward to reading your many blogs each day and learning from you and learn I do! I may not always comment but I have so gotten used to your voice that I don't know what I will do should something happen to you? I appreciate your nagging Dear Heart as I know it is for my best interest and I know your heart's intention is for my own good. Thank You for that!!! I agree that the friendships I've formed on Blogger have been just as real as any friendship I may have formed in person. I disagree with my children on that one as they seem to think this is not real. I have to laugh when I show them my address book and say well then where did this beautiful card come from or the awesome gift sent through the mail? They don't get it and that is alright...
    I love you too Mary and your friendship is very, very important to me and I feel blessed to know you!!!
    (((Big Hugs)))

  2. Dear Mary,
    Blogland has closed the gap on forming new friendships. You are a dear and I'm sending you a hug via the internet! xoxo

  3. Now to see if I can comment here......

    It's an experiment, with every Blogger comment box I come upon.


    Aunt Amelia

  4. Smooch! Blogger buddies are great, it's true!

  5. Hugs to you Mary, you are a gem! And I am so sorry about the passing of Elizabeth, how very sad. It would be nice to chat over coffee and a sweet though! But blogging is quite rewarding because of the lovely people we meet.

  6. Hi dear Mary.....what a heartfelt post you have shared today. I certainly consider you one of my very dearest friends out here in blogland. Hopefully, one day, our paths will cross. We have so very much in common....it is a rare gift when that happens.

    I'm sorry that I can't stop in as often when we travel.....the park wi-fi systems take so long to download blogs...that sometimes....the only one I CAN DOWNLOAD is mine when I am able to sneak in a post.

    I have missed you and your wonderful heart.

    Stay well dear friend,


  7. You are awesome woman! When I'm reading your words I often picture you at work, or in your backyard you speak of where you go late at night. I know we've never met but each and every word you offer to me makes such a difference in my life. Bloggerland friends are friends. Friends are friends and thank the Goddess for that.

  8. Its me again Mary.....Just wanted to let you know that I LOVED the comment you left on my gardening post. It never occurred to me that fairies could be involved.....what an absolutely magical thought.



  9. Thought I was the only one that worried when I heard no word..........GUESSSSSSS NOT! ;0)

  10. Very nice article. So inspiring and pleasant. Keep it up!