Strawberries are the angels of the earth, innocent and sweet with green leafy wings reaching heavenward.
Shame on me. I already ate most of them in one day.
And a good Monday morning to all. Had a nice, quiet weekend. Caught up on some much needed rest. On Saturday I took a trip to the fruit stand. I bought some sweet seedless black grapes and some strawberries that were so sweet I didn't need any cool whip to eat them. I also bought all the ingredients for a broccoli, carrots, and cauliflower stir fry. I had the urge for it, and I really do need to incorporate more vegetables into my diet. I HAD been doing so well, but then winter with its 14 snowstorms hit, and I found myself falling into a state of depression. To cope, I ate...and ate...and ate. Now that Spring has sprung not only are my emotions so much lighter, but also my menu.
Sure did make a lot of it.
Hubby also opened my eyes on Sunday morning before Church. "You are putting on too much weight and have to start watching what you eat. I don't want you to have a stroke or a heart attack. I want you with me a long time." He is right. I have gotten downright FAT. 216 pounds. Four years ago I was 140 pounds. Never, ever weighed that much. No more Twinkies at 10 pm and no more cookies for mid-morning snacks. Rice and potatoes will be kept to a minimum and more fresh vegetables like above will take their place.
I really do hate being a nag, but sometimes one has to do it...and sometimes it does pay off. Hubby finally cleaned out a bag from his closet. Only one bag, but it was a start. And he actually only kept two shirts out of it. When he pulled out a second bag it turned out to be a Spring jacket I had bought the year before we moved here. I'd thought the moving men had lost it. That sure was a blessing. With the weather cooling down this week, it sure will come in handy.
I've been doing a lot of thinking lately about why I have been so unhappy at the Center these past few weeks, and I have come to the conclusions that yes, boredom does have its role, but the number one culprit is the generation gap. I find myself once again 'outside the norm', and even though everyone does their best to make me a part of, there is still that gap between us. We come from different eras. Just the other day while I was at my new lunch room table the dance instructor, a client volunteer, came to chat with the ladies I sit with. He had seen that the Italian woman, Maria, and I seemed to be close, and he asked her, "Is this your daughter?" She laughed and said "No, but she could be." Then he asked, "Is this your new home attendant?" He just could believe that I, too, was a client there.
And then, not too long ago when I was the only one who showed for women's group, the intern who facilitates it and I sat and talked for awhile. She is aware that I spent many years running groups and stated that she feels she has lost control of the group. What can she do? I assured her that she had done everything right, that it was a difficult group, and I felt she had handled it well. Aside from bringing a weekly topic which no one wanted, there was nothing she could have done differently. She then asked, "How were you able to handle it? You must have found it difficult at times, After all, you are from a different generation."
Yes, I am from a different generation, but that doesn't tell the whole story. There are other little subtle differences that further compound the issue. For one thing, all of them are widows. Every single one of them. (Well, they do say that women live longer than men.) I, on the other hand, live with my significant other. Our lifestyles have also been different. Having come from a different generation, their role in life was to be a stay at home wife and mother. Most married as soon as they got out of high school and never held a job, let alone had a career. I, on the other hand, was a child of the 60's. I was the 'flower child'. They were my parents. My children and my home have always been important to me, but I also came from a generation of woman who went on to further their education and not only held jobs, but had careers equal to that of men.
I've also come to the conclusion that I could probably attend every program in Brooklyn and not find one that is any different than the one I already attend. And I do have friends here. I have been accepted, and that means a lot to someone who was a childhood outcast. Perhaps it is Spring fever that is bringing my boredom on, and perhaps it is because I am tired of staying indoors. Nature is calling me. Yes, perhaps it has nothing to do with my peers. Either way, I have plans to spend a lot of time outdoors this summer. I yearn to be close to nature. One or two days a week at the Center will keep me connected, and perhaps by the time winter rolls around again, I will find the Center enjoyable again. Sometimes we just have to pull back for awhile.
And with that, I wish you all a fantastic Monday and a fabulous new week.