Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time.
Jean Paul Richter
And a happy Monday morning to you all. Cold weather has once again appeared, with hints of snow by Wednesday, but we were blessed with some great Springlike weather over the past few days. I had a wonderful weekend, a joyful birthday. I made a pot of sauce with meatballs, sausage, and ribs, put together a salad, and toasted some garlic bread for a yummy Italian meal. I ate everything I shouldn't have, but hey, a birthday only comes once a year.
The weather was so pleasant on Saturday that I did a little gardening. Indoor, of course. Started my herb garden. This year I am hoping it will grow. I invested in a good potting soil and bought new seeds. Hope that is enough to do the trick. I really want a house filled with plants. Unfortunately, I have discovered that although I may have windows, I still don't get a huge amount of sun because my windows look out onto a small courtyard. The buildings which surround pretty much keep the sun at bay.
They are holding a fashion show at the Center on April 10th, and I have been talked into being a part of it. I have no idea what to wear. We don't have to wear anything super special like dressy dresses or gowns, but we do have have to dress up a bit. I donated almost everything to the Good Will and only kept dress down clothes. I do have dressy stuff for summer, but it won't be warm enough yet. I did do some birthday shopping over the weekend, but couldn't find a darn thing. If only I could lose a few pounds. If only I had the willpower. (Sigh)
So, I have agreed to be in a fashion show, need to lose 38 pounds according to the doctor, and have nothing to wear. Of course, that's my low self-esteem raring its ugly head. Irrational thoughts racing about unchecked. What if no one claps for you? What if they laugh? As I said, irrational thoughts stemming from childhood taunts and teasing. One thinks they have worked through all the emotional damage that was wrought, and for all purposes they have, yet, all of a sudden something happens that stirs up a painful memory, and it is off to the races again.
I'll be all right, though. This is just 'me'. I'm not dealing with a bunch of mean spirited classmates. I'll be modeling in front of senior citizens who are far past that bullying and teasing age. And, they genuinely 'like' me. It feels good to walk in and have my peers say "Oh, I am so glad you are here," and not because they may have to cover my group if I am out. No, today I am not that little girl who was shunned and beaten down. Today I am somebody.
Speaking of the fashion show. I really do need to get my hair cut before then. Do you remember when I had my hair cut a little more than a year ago? Well, I think my thyroid meds may have something to do with it, but this is what it looks like now....
Seriously. It took me six years or more to grow it to this length before. I am also lightening it gradually. Time to start looking my age. I was thinking of the following haircut I found in 'Sophisticates Hairstyle Guide'.
Amy stars in Bluebloods, and every Friday night I find myself watching her hair with envy. It is short, yes, but she is able to do so much with it. What do you think?
Well, that's about it for my weekend. As another year begins for me, I look forward to developing a healthier new lifestyle, completing this portion of my Druid trainings, and basically just enjoying all that life has to offer. I am 67 years old now, and for most of that time I was too busy working to enjoy life. In this, my first full year of retirement, I am finally going to start to live.
Because time itself is like a spiral, something special happens on your birthday each year: The same energy that God invested in you at birth is present once again.
Menachem Mendel Schneerson