Wednesday, January 29, 2014

An Angel Watches Over Me

We are each of us angels with only one wing, and we can only fly by embracing one another.  

Luciano de Crescenzo 

I have always believed in Angels. I do. I always have. I believe they have always been with us, watching over us since the beginning of time. Each of us has our own Guardian Angel who is assigned to us at birth and watches over us throughout our lifetime. They bring us messages, but many of us either don't believe in them or are just don't pay attention. Sometimes they come to warn us of danger, other times they come to help us to deal with a particular situation, and still other times they come to protect us. And we must not forget those times they come to bring us a joyful announcement of some sort. 

I've told this story before, so if you have heard it already, please bear with me. It is the story of the night I not only met my Guardian Angel, but she actually saved my life. When I was in my 20's and 30's I suffered from sleep apnea. If you suffer from this, you know how frightening it can be. There are two types...obstructive sleep apnea, the most common form in which the airway collapses or becomes blocked causing shallow breathing or breathing pauses. The second type, the one I suffered from is not as common--central sleep apnea. The area of the brain that controls your breathing doesn't send the correct signals to your breathing muscles, causing you to stop breathing for brief periods. Many a night I would awaken gasping for breath.

Then, one night I had a particularly bad episode, and awoke thinking, "This is it. I am not coming out of this one." I struggled, but was unable to find my breath, and everything began growing dark. And then I saw her. She was standing in the bedroom doorway, just watching over me. She was beautiful, dressed in a white shimmery gown. In fact, she looked exactly like the little Angel below that I purchased for my tree this year.

As you know, hubby and I have recently fallen onto hard times. Money is material and cannot buy happiness, but when you run out of it and cannot pay your rent and buy food, it sure can lead to a lot of unhappiness. Fortunately we are not there yet, but for months now I have been paying out more than I have been bringing in, and most of my money is gone. I've cut out many of the foods we like, we no longer order in once a week, and forget shopping for fun stuff. I am frightened and angry. This didn't have to be. Granted our lifestyle was due to change when I retired, but I had worked it all out that even without hubby's SSD we'd survive. The SSD would just make it better. Who knew that paperwork would mess us up so badly. (That darn paperwork again.) 
I have really been having a hard time of it lately, and spending so much time in the house with little contact with the outside world, in person and online, didn't help any.  I had a lot of time to think and found myself falling into a state of depression I'd not ever felt before. Worries set in about losing our apartment and not having enough to eat.  I always used to say when I was working, "I am only one paycheck away." I rarely got dressed, what for, did nothing but eat foods that were bad for me, tried hard to get into hobbies, but with no interest I didn't get very far. I did manage to do some reading, and that really helped me through the tough times. I began focusing on Miss Minga and the fact that she is up in years, and that I should prepare myself, and then I would sit and cry. And this was how I have been passing my days.

But, I did make sure I at least got out on Sundays to go to Church, and it was there that my Guardian Angel reminded me of her presence. Last week I was feeling rather badly when I went to Church. I hadn't wanted to go, but I knew I had to get out of the house. But, I had to pull myself out of this funk, and what better place to do so than in a spiritual place where I feel at peace with myself. The service began, and I was disappointed that the Priest I enjoy listening to had done the earlier service instead and bemoaning the fact that the singer was not there. To make matters worse, someone was sitting in MY seat. I always sit by the aisle in the last row. Little things had begun bothering me lately. Disgruntled, I sat in the second from the last row instead.

Just before communion everyone goes to their knees to pray. Most prayer in this church is done standing. Sort of took me by surprise when I first attended because whenever I had gone to church, and a minister said "Let us pray" we immediately got to our knees.  Well, I cannot go on my knees. They hurt too bad.  So I sit and lean like I am praying, and when I looked down I saw it. There at my feet was a white feather. White feathers are known to be the most notable sign that an Angel is nearby.  This past Sunday I went to Church again, and this time I was able to get my regular seat. When I looked down, surprisingly the white feather was again at my feet and a few inches away there sat a shiny new copper penny. This brought such a smile to my face because I know now that I have never been alone.

Have you been visited by an Angel?  I'd love to hear your story.  And you may have been visited without your knowing.  Angels will often leave signs to remind us that they are there to comfort and guide us. Look for the following signs:

White feathers...often referred to as 'calling cards'
Sparkles of Light
Beautiful Music  
An intriguing fragrance

These are just a few of my Angels...and some pictures of me and hubby.

This is my collection of Archangels.

Archangel Michael who was missing from the collection when I bought it.  So, I picked up this one instead, very appropriate as he reigns as the head of all of the Angels.  He should be distinctive.  


  1. A beautiful sign -- a feather AND a penny! I think your Angel is telling you not to worry about your money issues -- all will be resolved soon.

  2. I believe in angels too mary - and I think that you are being taken care of.