Under the Weather

Each patient carries his own doctor inside him. They come to us now knowing this truth. We are at our best when they give the doctor who resides within each patient a chance to go to work.

Albert Schweitzer

I'm feeling a wee bit under the weather today. In fact, I am feeling downright nasty. Did you know that being 'under the weather' is an old sailor phrase.  When sailors became ill due to the waves or rough weather, they would go below deck to recover and get away from the bad weather; hence, 'under the weather'.   

As for me, I seem to have picked up a very nasty tummy bug yesterday. I heard it was going around. Woke me about 4 am in the morning.  Bad stomach cramps.  I've been through this before so I knew exactly what to expect. Needless to say, it will be a very bland diet for me today....banana, rice, dry toast, and some yogurt, but later on when this bug settles down some.  I'm starving for some 'real' food this morning, but I know better. Have to let this thing run its course.

Last night I had a rather strange dream. Someone kept calling me on the phone, and when I picked it up, all they said was, "You let me down.  You left me when I was sick."  I don't know what to make of it.  Another life, perhaps? 

Lately, many of my dreams have been strange.  Most seem to center upon either my completing a  project.  I can't remember what the project is or even if it is the same in each dream.  And sometimes I find myself packing to move.  The house I am moving from is not any place I remember living in, but it is somewhat familiar.  Most of the time a man is involved.  He appears to have been someone who I was deeply in love with, but whom no longer loved me.  I spend much time in the dreams trying to regain his affection.  

It was suggested that perhaps there was something going on in my psyche that I am having trouble bringing into focus or a part of me that is feeling let down and calling for my attention.  As far as the dream with phone calls, it may very well have something to do with my ex.  I left him in 1991.  In early 1996 he was diagnosed with a rare form of groin cancer and died later that year.  Perhaps my son's constant chatter about his father has spurred this dream...or perhaps my ex is reaching out to me....and not in a good way. 

 The Land of Dreams

Awake, awake my little Boy!
Thou wast thy Mother's only joy:
Why dost thou weep in thy gentle sleep?
Awake! thy Father does thee keep.

"O, what land is the Land of Dreams?
What are its mountains, and what are its streams?
O Father, I saw my Mother there,
Among the lillies by waters fair.

Among the lambs clothed in white
She walked with her Thomas in sweet delight.
I wept for joy, like a dove I mourn -
O when shall I return again?"

Dear child, I also by pleasant streams
Have wandered all night in the Land of Dreams;
But though calm and warm the waters wide,
I could not get to the other side.

"Father, O Father, what do we here,
In this land of unbelief and fear?
The Land of Dreams is better far
Above the light of the Morning Star." 

William Blake