Friday, February 4, 2011

Every now and then go away, have a little relaxation, for when
you come back to your work your judgment will be surer.
Go some distance away because then the work appears smaller
and more of it can be taken in at a glance and a lack
of harmony and proportion is more readily seen.
Leonardo Da Vinci

Well, the weekend is upon us, and Saturday will be a rather busy day for me. It's my cooking weekend again.  Boy, do those two weeks seem to pass by so quickly. And, on top of that, they are predicting another storm; yes, another storm only they say this one should be more rain than snow. Let's hope so. Maybe it will get rid of some of this dirty mess of piled up snow. By now, it has gotten so ugly.  Hoping that you will all do me a favor. Next year in December when I start groaning about how I wish I would have some snow, please do remind me of this year.

So, Saturday I will be very busy. Going to rise early and get to the market hopefully before it gets too bad out, and then come home and cook everything.  Sunday will be spent on some much-needed me time. We all need me time to give both our body and mind a break from our usual routine. Let's face it...we work at work, then we work at home. We clean, do laundry, shop for food, prepare meals, etc...and on and on it goes. Even stay at home moms need some downtime. We are all so busy that one day we look at the calendar and realize that we haven’t done anything for ourselves for the past few months. 

It seems as if I am always doing everything for everybody else and not having a shred of time left for the activities I love to do.  I imagine that is the way it is for all of us.  And, it  doesn't help that I am one of those people who think that  I am the only one who knows how to do it, so, if I want it done right, then I have to do it myself.  Take the ironing, for example.  Every Sunday morning it's my chore to do the week's worth of ironing for me and hubby.  Not, that he hasn't tried.  On more than one occasion he'll say, "Let me do it," but then he does it so slow that I take the iron away from him and do it myself.  Now, why should his being slow bother long as the ironing is done?  But, that's only another of my 'only I can do it right' attitude.

I've always been a people-pleaser. That's my problem. Always doing for others because I wanted them to like me. All my life, whenever someone asked me for help...even when it was something I didn't want to do, I would almost always say yes. I was that good little girl who took on all the cooking, cleaning, and housework at a young age because I wanted my parents to notice me. It didn't really work the way I wanted it to, but it did prepare me to be a wife and mother. And when I grew up, I never knew how to say 'no' to anyone. I was the one who took on all the extra projects at work, then came home and did it all. I took care of everyone.
Eventually you burn yourself out. I've been there and done that. Saying 'no' still doesn't come easy, and I still feel a sense of guilt when I call in to take a day off...even though I earned it. But I am learning, and it is becoming easier for me to pick up that phone and say 'I won't be in today.'  But  I have also learned this past year to take that time for myself, that  precious me-time where one lounges about  and reads and eats and sleeps, whatever one's little heart desires.  It's so hard to find, and when you do, it's important that you grab it.   

Here's hoping you all have a wonderful weekend, and be sure to take some me-time for yourself.  You've earned it.

Rest when you're weary. Refresh and renew yourself,
your body, your mind, your spirit. Then get back to work.
Ralph Marston


  1. Ikinda thought this was your weekend to cook, etc. I hope you are soooo lazy on Sunday, doing only what your heart desires! :)

    Wishing for you the things that delight your spirit and soul!

    Blessings and Much Love!

  2. Excellent that you balance your very-busy-Sat., with your me-time-Sun.!

    Hugs and ♥'s...
    'Cause Valentine Day is coming!

  3. hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Another way we are alike.

    We be The Bobbsey Twins.........remember that book?
    I'm hoping to be leaning back on an airplane seat this time tomorrow. :0)
    HAGr8 weekend Mary.

  4. I've read so many books and blogs by self-proclaimed people pleasers who have problems saying no. I've never had that problem and I've never cared what people think. There is a down side to that as well. Balance is the key I guess.

  5. Hope you are able to enjoy your weekend. Be selfish and take your own advise;^) X.

  6. enjoy your weekend Mary be sure to find time to put your feet up and get some ME time you deserve it x x

  7. me too.. a people pleaser .. enjoy your me time.. make it extra special.. xo

  8. Mary, I am not quite sure what is happening with blogger.. if a very weird comment came from me about donuts.. please disregard.. that was from another blog comment. weird.

  9. Oh wow, that rings so true for me. I want help but I expect others to do everything the way I would. It's been hard for me to just "go away" and let them do it whatever way they do it, but I have made some progress. I know there are a lot of women in your boat as far as having no me time. I think women today have MORE responsibilities and less me time (sounded like a good idea back in the bra-burning days, didn't it?)

    I was a stay at home mom and what people forget is that it is a 24 hour a day job, so me time has to be found, no matter what. Don't give up. Me time is important and it is important for everyone. Happy Mom is happy family!

  10. Boy, Mary, do you and I sound like two peas in a pod. I can so relate to this post today.



  11. another people pleaser reporting for duty :)

  12. Oh, I hear you loud and clear! Count me in as another people pleaser!