Hope Lives

It's been such a hellish week thus far...end of the month reports, discharges, intakes...and, of course, dealing with the loss of all the wildlife in my neighborhood. Each morning and evening I find myself stepping outdoors gazing about, hoping, but seeing no signs of life...even the little kitten I saw the other day has since disappeared. Today is the first sunny morning we have had all week, and as I sipped my coffee on the back porch, looking about, as usual, I saw nothing. I was about to head indoors when something caught at the corner of my eye. No, it wasn't a trick of the eye, not an illusion. Mama Cat was there...stretched out on one of the benches in my neighbor's backyard....catching a bit of the sun and giving herself a bath.  My eyes filled with tears of joy as I thought to myself, "She's alive....and with life comes hope."  

According to mythology, when Pandora opened her famous box, she let out all the evils out into the world, but she was so filled with grief and pain that she didn't hear the voice of hope which was begging to be released. Finally, at the depths of her despair, Pandora sat in front of the box seeking some relief from her pain, when her sobs finally exhausted her and she became quiet; it was then she heard it, that wee little voice begging to be freed. At first, she was terrified and for good reason, but after awhile, she figured could be anything worse than what she had already unleashed upon the world?   So, after carefully considering the consequences, Pandora decided that there was nowhere deeper or darker to go; she opened the box and HOPE flew our and began to heal our wounds.

And, my dear blog friends, that is exactly how I felt this morning when I opened the door and saw Mama Cat.  It was as if I had opened the lid of Pandora's Box. All week long I have been among the walking wounded, despairing, in pain, feeding on anger and and vengeful feeling.  I was consumed with "How can I strike back?  What can I do?"  But Mama brought a new hope. And as I walked to work, I saw a family of squirrels who lived down the block.  Perhaps one day a new squirrel family will return. Yes,Hope lives on in Brooklyn....in the form of calico mother cat. 

For human nature Hope remains alone

Of all the deities; the rest are flown.
Faith is departed; Truth and Honour dead;
And all the Graces too, my friends, are fled.
The scanty specimens of living worth,
Dwindled to nothing, and extinct on earth.
Yet whilst I live and view the light of heaven,
Since hope remains and never has been driven
From the distracted world--the single scope
Of my devotion is to worship Hope.
When hecatombs are slain, and altars burn,
When all the deities adored in turn,
Let Hope be present; and with Hope, my friend,
Let every sacrifice commence and end.
Yes, Insolence, Injustice, every crime,
Rapine and Wrong, may prosper for a time;
Yet shall they travel on to swift decay,
Who tread the crooked path and hollow way.

--Theogris of Megara (6th Century B.C.)--

The Kumulipo

At  the time that turned the heat of the earth 
At the time that the heavens turned and changed 
At the time that the light of the sun was subdued 
To cause light to break forth 
At the time of the night of Makali'i  (winter)   

Then began the slime which established the earth 
The source of deepest darkness 
Of the depths of darkness, of the depths of darkness 
Of the darkness of the sun, in the depth of night, It is night
So night is born.

The chant above is the beginning of a two thousand line creation chant called the Kumulipo.  The Kumulipo or source of life is an ancient Hawaiian chant, consisting of 2,077 lines traditionally chanted by one person over six hours. The Kumulipo chant records the sequence of creation of the aumakua (ancestral-family spirits) - and the Kumulipo symbol shows the sequence of the creation of the universe, leading to what physicists now call the "Big Bang". It reflects the theories about the origins of the cosmos and life on this planet and provides a concept of world order...reminding all of us about the core relationship people have with earth and how to live harmoniously.

The Kumulipo not only follows the evolutionary progression of living creatures from the oceans to the land, but also illustrates how the oceans are an integral part of air, land, weather, and of plants and animals found everywhere. In addition, the Kumulipo reminds us that the oceans are a source for many things beyond those of economic or transportation value. The Kumulipo describes how the oceans are also a source of health, providing a variety of medicines for physical and emotional well being, as well as serving as a source for cleansing, healing and nourishing the spirit, and for learning the ways of nature. 

The Kumulipo is divided into two different time periods. The first of these is called "po"; this is the age of the spirit world. Everything is still in darkness, and it is not clear if the earth exists or if the events described occur in some other, transcendental place. During this age, the lower life forms come to be, and the chant depicts the concept of life going through stages similar to the development of a new-born child. One form of matter changes into another leading to the existence of early mammals. 

The second time period, called "ao", begins with the coming of light and  the gods who husband the changing of animals into humans. Evolution is now of one form of life into another. Beginning with the image of a god (tiki), the world of living men and women explodes on a living earth. This is also the time when the light of reason dawns. Life can now cope on its own, and, in the complex form of humans, it begins to act otherwise than from impulse. Then the genealogy of people continues on into the late 1700's when the chant is spoken to the last divine child born who can be traced back to the very beginning, to a time when gods were still on earth and the first human was born. 

The last time the full Kumulipo is known to have been solemnly recited, was in 1789. This was in honor of Captain Cook, who was thought to be the god Lono returning to Hawaii. 

(I don't know if Maukie will do it on your computer, but on mine, he sits and listens to every word as if he understands.)

Libra

Time is passing by far too quickly for me.  It seems like almost yesterday I was writing about Virgo, and now here we are in Libra. We've harvested the food and had our feast.  The days and nights are growing cooler  preparing to enter Scorpio, a time of endings, but endings with the promise of a new beginning....but before we begin our descent into the darkness of winter that comes with Scorpio, we have Libra...a time of delicate balance. From September 22nd, the well-known Autumnal Equinox, until October 22nd we experience those golden days when nature seems to take a pause and everything is a bit dreamy and hushed during the day light hours as the nights become ever crisper, colder, and darker.

Libra, the seventh sign of the western Zodiac, was the last of the signs to be officially recognized. It is a Cardinal, Masculine, Air sign ironically ruled by the Goddess, Venus. The symbol for Libra is the Scales which represent the setting Sun balanced between night and day, and as the scales of balance, it is the only symbol in astrology which is not represented by a person or an animal.  It signifies a balanced approach to one's life and reflects harmony, fairness, and beauty.  Back in ancient times,  Scorpio and Libra were actually one constellation with Libra being the claws of Scorpio. Libra was just an empty space of unimportant stars, yet though its reach to Virgo's hand,  Libra became an instrument of justice through the hand of Virgo, the star 'Spica.'

The glyph for Libra is two parallel horizontal lines.  The top line has a half-circle coming off the top which represents the setting Sun as it descends over the horizon at the beginning of its annual cycle into darkness, death and re-birth. Libra, the  scales of balance and final judgment dates back to the ancient Egyptian funerary rites  wherein a scale was allegedly used to weigh the souls of the dead. Anubis weighs the heart of the deceased against the feather of Ma'at, the Goddess of truth and justice to determine whether or not that individual had lived a sufficiently commendable life to be considered for rebirth into an eternal life.  As the goddess of order and harmony, Ma'at was said to represent the natural law or universal law, and in the Hall of Ma'at, those who had obeyed the natural law were saved.

In Libra, we become conscious of our need for companionship, for partnership; hence, Libra has everything to do with how we relate to others. As an archetype, there is no one archetype, it many different, each related to the different sides of its energy-- The Lover, The Advocate, The Diplomat, The Judge, The Counselor, The Co-dependent, The Mediator, The Unrequited Lover, The Victim, and The Politician.  It also shares a deep affinity with another archetype which the Greeks called the Goddess, Aphrodite; the Romans called Her Venus. Known as the morning or evening star, Venus is visible just before sunrise or just after sunset. In nature, She is feminine, nocturnal, and temperately cold and moist.

As an evening star, She appears in the west during the period following sunset, and as She draws close to the Sun, She disappears from view while continuing to circle the Earth invisibly masked by the light of the sun. Them as She moves ahead of the sun, She eventually becomes visible again in the east as She rises shortly before the sun. During the ancient times, Her evening manifestation was said to bring men and women to the act of love in bed, but Her morning appearance woke them up to go to war. One role Venus plays in our modern times is to awaken us to acknowledge our divine. 
 

To the early Christians, Libra represented the Apostle Philip;  The Hebrews called it Moznayim.. To the Ancient Chinese, Libra was known as Show Sing, the "Star of Longevity," but in later generations its name was changed to Tien Ching, (Celestial Balance).  The sacred books of India refer to Libra as Tula (balance) where it is depicted as a man bent on one knee holding the scales aloft.  In modern times, Libra is usually the symbol of the "Scales of Justice" and stands alone, not being held by any personage.

The stars of Libra are also believed represent the Golden Chariot of Pluto/Hades which he used whenever he wanted to visit the upper world.   Four black horses pulled his chariot, and when he saw Persephone, the beautiful young daughter of Zeus and Demeter, he was so enraptured by her beauty that he had to have Her for himself. So, he abducts Her and makes Her the Queen of the Underworld. Demeter, the Goddess of agriculture, is so distraught about losing Her daughter, that She refuses to allow the seeds to sprout.

Zeus tries to convince Hades to let Persephone go, but, since She had eaten six pomegranate seeds, Hades won’t let her go. So, Zeus rules that She has to divide her time, eight months of the year She may visit her mother, and during the rest of the year She has to stay in the underworld. So, every year, on March 21st, Persephone leaves the Underworld and brings Spring with Her, and in the Autumn, She returns to Her husband....and the time of darkness begins.

The Healing Begins

May the stars carry your sadness away,

May the flowers fill your heart with beauty,

May hope forever wipe away your tears,

And, above all, may silence make you strong.

--Chief Dan George--

What a lovely blessing!  I'd like to take a few minutes here to thank everyone for their kind words yesterday. It has been a very rough weekend for me. I'm still finding this whole episode so difficult to deal with, to rid myself of this anger,and to be honest, I don't think I ever will, but I do know that talking about it has helped and keeping myself busy will keep me from allowing the anger and resentment to eat away at me.  I don't understand. I'll never understand how one could be so cruel...especially one who professes to be such a God-fearing person...yet, who is not only guilty of the slaughter of innocent animals, but also guilty of propagating bigotry and racism as well...one who feels that hers is the only true faith; hence, she and hers can do whatever they want.  And sadly, they can; nothing will be done about it...legally...because here they far have too much power...and law enforcement is afraid of rioting.

For as long as I can remember, I have had a love for animals. My mom may not have known how to show love to her child, but she love the animals, and I am grateful that she instilled that love in me as well. When I I was a child, I would pick up every stray on the street and bring it home, and mom would help to either find their owners or a new home after nursing them back to health. In the neighborhood where I spent my childhood, there wasn't so many strays, but what there was, I always managed to find.  One day I remember bringing a little kitty home and hiding him in my room.  Mom went ballistic when she found him...not so much because of kitty...but because I had hidden the little creature from her, and he was full of fleas. We ended up keeping him...after a major de-fleaing of both him and my room.    

There are so many things one can learn from animals...from embracing our spirituality to just plain old responsibility. In fact, as far as time goes back animals have been around, humans have embraced them. Even when looking at ancient drawings on walls in caves we find there are always animals drawn onto them along with humans. I know they have taught me how to love and how to be loved....unconditionally. They teach us to relax and slow down and they keep us company. If you just sit back and watch, you can get a glimpse into their mind. They do not take things for granted or stress out about things that are not under their control. They play, love, never seem to get embarrassed no matter who is watching and take it easy.

I miss them dearly, my animal friends. The squirrels, my spoiled little squirrels.  I always kept cans of mixed nuts on hand, and they knew exactly where to come for their treat. They got to know me so well that when I opened the back door, they'd just stay there munching away, holding the nuts with their little paws. How can I ever forget that day when I was pretty much broke and couldn't afford their special nuts, so silly me, I bought a can of peanuts instead...and the little critters refused to eat.  

And mama and her babes...I tried so hard to catch them, but the kittens were already too fast.  So, I fed them, hoping to keep them here where they had shelter, food, and water...but mama had other ideas...just as her mama before her. I know it's their nature to explore, but, by golly, why couldn't they have stayed.  And then there is the big black boy and gray boy...the daddy's of them all.  How beautiful they were!!!  And all the rest who have disappeared throughout the years.  

I've cried...I've written a hate letter, pouring out all of my anger....venting my hatred towards this woman.  I've prayed and lit candles, and I am keeping their memory alive. They had a tough life, but they persevered, and they taught the meaning of strength.  

Yesterday I couldn't stop making trips to the back yard, peering about, hoping....but nothing stirred.  Then, late afternoon I saw it...the unmistakable head of one of the little kittens prancing through the tall grass...and hope once again came alive. Poor little thing was running in a panicked fashion, looking this way and that, obviously frightened up being orphaned and alone.  If I could have climbed the fence and chased after him, I would have, but I did the next best thing, I put some food out, hoping to entice him.  But, alas, this morning the food was left untouched.  Now all I can do is pray.

What is life?
It is the flash of a firefly in the night.
It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime.
It is the little shadow which runs across
the grass and loses itself in the sunset.

Crowfoot, Blackfoot warrior and orator 1830 - 1890

Are There Some Things That Cannot Be Forgiven

The practice of forgiveness is our most important contribution to the healing of the world.--Marianne Williamson

Forgiveness is a necessary part of healing a wounded heart. However, many people misunderstand what it means to forgive. Forgiveness does not mean you accept whatever misdeed has happened nor does it mean that you will ever tolerate such behavior again. Forgiveness means that you refuse to let bitter feelings take root inside of you for when bitterness takes root inside of your heart, it is like a slow poison that drains the life out of you, affecting who you are as a person.

Forgiveness is a hard thing to do. I've experienced many times in my life where I needed to be able to forgive to move on...my parents, my ex-husband and his family.  I'm not going to lie, I still carry a lot of feelings around me...many below the surface, but this is not about the past.  This is about NOW.  This is about something I am finding hard to let go of, and wonder if it is even possible to forgive...and I wonder if there are some things you just should not even try to forgive. Do we forgive evil?  Do we even try?

The story I am about to tell you will break your heart; it has broken mine.  I've not even begun to share this tale with you, and already my eyes are watering up with tears. I've thought about whether or not this is fair to even lay this on you, but I really need some advice because I am hurting right now; I'm hurting bad, and I need some help.  Perhaps this is post may not even be about forgiveness; perhaps it is about the healing of just being able to tell someone about the pain I am carrying within. I've tried the past few days to be cheerful...even posted some fun things on the blog, but I realize that was all a cover-up for what I am really feeling.

This  story actually begins about seven years ago.  My cat was an indoor/outdoor cat at the time.  She loved prancing around the yards, harming nothing, but getting to know her territory.  Then, one day I called her for dinner, and she didn't come.  Immediately, I knew something was wrong, and then I saw her.  She was in such bad shape that I had to pick her up and carry her into the house. I nursed her back with strained baby food and pedialyte. It turned out she had been poisoned.  From that day on, she became an indoor cat.  It was much, much later that old man upstairs told me about the woman down the block that poisons the cats, but by then, their house was sold, and the woman was gone.

But Minga was now getting up in years so I still kept her as an indoor cat...and thankfully.  A few weeks back I posted about the poor little squirrel found dead at the foot of my steps.  Well, lately I have noticed there are NO squirrels prancing along the wires.  They've all disappeared.  And I think I also mentioned about Mama Cat and her babies. They, too, have disappeared. The possum is gone and so is the raccoon.  The squirrels, the possum, and the raccoons are what could be called friendly fire, for what I've discovered is that the cat-hating lady never left; she's been there all along.  Well, not exactly her, but a new evil came along to take her place. 

There was quite an uproar Thursday night...about 1:30 in the morning.  It's a Jewish holiday so my neighbors have all been celebrating pretty late into the night.  I was awoken by a lady screaming "They're God's creation; how can you be so inhumane?" Amongst other things, I heard the words cats and poison, and I knew what was going on.  I immediately threw on my robe and went out there to speak my peace.  The police had been called as well as the ASPCA. but the only thing I heard was the woman get a warning, "You can't do that.  You can't poison them."  I didn't sleep a wink after that; hence my day off on Friday. 


So now, my dear friends, when I step out into the backyard, it is so silent; so devoid of life. Even the birds don't even sing anymore. My heart is broken, and I have shed so many tears. Last night I lit a candle and went outdoors to say a prayer, but I haven't been able to let go of this anger; it is eating away at me, and I know I have to find a way to let it go.  Is this person someone who can be forgiven, that even deserves to be forgiven?  Can one forgive evil? Do I pray for her soul, or do continue to live my life filled with all this hate.  I know that is wrong; I have to let go, but right now, I don't know how. I wish I could say that if I forgive, and this pain will go away, but I don't think it is going to be that easy. These are the innocents, the creatures of the earth.I know that parents forgive those who murder their children, but I can't do it.   How do I let let it go?

Thanks for letting me share. I do apologize if I've spoiled anyone's day.  Not my intentions.  I just had to let this go, and hopefully, get some healing.  I've been holding this in since Thursday.  Perhaps this will be my first step to healing.

To hate another is to hate yourself.

We all live within the one Universal Mind.
What we think about another, we think about ourselves.
If you have an enemy, forgive him now.
Let all bitterness and resentment dissolve.
You owe your fellow man love; show him love, not hate.
Show charity and goodwill toward others
and it will return to enhance your own life
in many wonderful ways.
--Brian Adams--

Those Were the Days

It's Saturday; I got plenty of rest, and am feeling good.  Thanks all for your concern.  It's a good day today; the weather is cool and crisp, just like fall is supposed to be.  It's a great day to be alive.  And, I'm feeling so good, I thought I'd have a little fun today.  Hope you all enjoy reminiscing as much as I do.

It seems strange to think that when I was born in 1947 that  hardly anyone had a television set, let alone a car.  I guess I was one of the lucky ones for my family had both a car and an old black and white television set.   Popular television shows of the time were I Love Lucy, The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet, Leave it to Beaver. and Father Knows Best along with such variety shows as Milton Berle, Ed Sullivan, Abbott and Costello.  Forget about American Idol.  We had Ted Mack's Amateur Hour. That was the golden age of television variety; it was magical. 

My sons have never played a record; as a matter of fact, I don't even think they know what a record or a record player is. Now they have all these new-fangled gadgets that hold hundreds of songs in something smaller than my compact.  Remember the old 45's?...and such harmless songs as "When the Red Red Robin goes Bob Bob Bobbin' Along" or "I found My Thrill on Blueberry Hill".  Wow, in my day the Thrill was quite a racy song. What a different era that was. American Bandstand  was created on the heels of the Rock and Roll  craze, and it also helped to thrust the music into a whole new direction.   The show had real couples on it, and oftentimes the show was like a high school drama of who’s dating who and who broke up. I knew all of them by heart--Kenny Rossi and Arlene Sullivan, Justine and Bob, Pat Molitieri to name a few. 

I grew up in the era of Sock hops, hula hoops, and cruising; slang words were squares, chicks, be bop, a blast, cooties. Weed was slang for a regular cigarette back in those days. And as kids, we all wanted a Chatty Cathy, Mr. Potato Head, View Master and Reels, Betsy Wetsy, the original Barbie and Ken.  

  

Anybody remember getting dish towels in boxes of laundry detergent during the 1950's and early 60's? I am not totally sure what brand of detergent, but I think it was Duz.  And what about S & H Green Stamps.  For you youngsters out there, they were a form of trading stamps popular until about the late 1960's.  You purchased your food at the supermarket and according to the amount spent, you were awarded with a number of stamps which you saved and mounted in your book and redeemed for prizes.  

When I was growing up, we had a milkman who delivered milk directly to our house. In the mornings, we'd find the milk in glass bottles on our front porch. We bought Sunbeam bread, and sometimes penny or nickel candy.  We drank water from the tap not a bottle and nobody knew about the dangers of lead poisoning so even cribs were painted with brightly colored lead based paint. medicine and bottles with tablets did not have child proof lids

Parents couldn't reach us--there was no such thing as cell phones-- and most of the day we would be out playing with our friends. Our  parents knew we would be safe because there were  hardly any weirdos wandering the streets. If we got caught doing stuff we shouldn't, the cops would take us home, and we may well have a got a whipping for breaking the law, but no one threatened to call children's services when we got smacked. I remember being told, "Go out and get a switch." and when I got back, I'd be told, "That's too small, go out and get a bigger one."  Little did they nor I know that the bigger ones actually hurt a lot less. And if we played up in school the same applied. While playing we got cuts and bruises and the occasional tear in jeans but it was just part of being a kid and no visit to the hospital

We had no fancy games but could play for hours making a Go cart or a new tree swing and for other games most times we would find a ball and whatever we could use as a bat. or in the summer all jump into the nearest place we could find and if the water wasn't that clean we just didn't swallow it. We rode our bikes with no helmets and doing whatever stunts we could; remember how much heavier and hard-wearing bikes were in those days. And if we didn't get in the team, we were not good enough and that was that. But most of all we were allowed to be kids  To dream, to invent and to play.

Hope you all have a wonderful weekend filled with joy and play.

Taking the Day Off

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival;
a joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and attend them all!
Even if they're a crowd of sorrows
who violently sweep your house empty
of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honourable.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.
The dark thought, the same, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each guest has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

~ Malal al-Din Rumi ~

It's raining, it's pouring, the old man is snoring. Took the day for some much needed rest and recuperation...taking care of self. It's raining, a perfect day to stay in bed, and believe me, that's where I have been for most of the morning.  Had such a fitful night. I will share about it, but today is not the day.  Reading, eating, and sleeping. Almost finished with Eat, Pray, and Love and will be forever indebted to Mother Moon for turning me onto it. And speaking of being indebted.  I wish to thank Spirit Phoenix  for choosing me as the winner of her Birthday Giveaway.  She was one of the first people I met here on Blogland.  Check out her blog. 

Got my new set of runes yesterday and a workbook to go with them and now I am off to get to know them.  Hoping you all have a wonderful weekend.  Be back tomorrow.