Monday Afternoon This and That

It is the life of the crystal, the architect of the flake, the fire of the frost, the soul of the sunbeam. This crisp winter air is full of it.

John Burroughs,

Good morning everyone.  It sure is a cold one out there.  Winter has arrived.  Yesterday the wind was cold and blustery, and I saw snowflakes in the air.  I know some had snow, but we only had a few flakes.

Had a busy weekend.  Wrapped all my gifts yesterday.  Well, almost all of them.  I bought my daughter and two granddaughters a Chakra healing bracelet.  They have so many health issues.  My eldest granddaughter has heart problems, my youngest now is awaiting news to see if her biopsy shows cancer, and my daughter has kidney issues and high blood pressure.  So, I bought them each a bracelet then typed out what each crystal in the bracelet stands for.  Now I just have to get to the library to print out three copies.  Then I can wrap.  My grandson was in Afghanistan and loves army things so I bought him a fantastic army hat, but putting it in a box will only bend its shape so I have to get a gift bag for that one. 

Now to decide where to put them since I decided to get rid of my 24 year old tree and get a smaller tabletop model.  Guess I will just stack them up somewhere in the living room.  Today I'm going to hang around and take care of Christmas cards.  So proud of myself for getting everything done early.   

 Otherwise, all is done and ready for the big day.  Still unsure of holiday plans.  Was hoping to have the family meet here on Christmas Eve and all attend mass together, but I don't really know if that will happen.  I've not been a part of their life for so many years, and they have developed their own traditions.  Like Thanksgiving, I called my daughter to invite her and my grandchildren, and she said "all the kids missed her home cooking for the holidays so they were all going there.  Would you like to come?"  Maybe I am too sensitive and am expecting too much, but I felt that if they had 'really' wanted me to come I would have been called and invited, not invited as an afterthought when I called.

It's been so joyful for me being reunited with family, but it's also been bittersweet as well, and I often find myself in tears.  They all say they want to get to know me, but no one ever calls to ask how I am doing.  No one ever comments on my Facebook, even when I post that I am not feeling well.  Yet, I went to my mom's Facebook page, and they were always sending her pictures and online cards.  I know I am probably expecting too much; after all, my mom was mom to my daughter and grandma to her children, and I am but a stranger,  but that doesn't stop it from hurting.  

Thank you for listening.  It felt good getting it out.

Have a good one.