Under the Weather

You can find examples of how little we value ourselves everywhere you look.

The signs on the front of the convenience stores where Stephen lives in Florida

tell the story. Beer, ice, bread and milk are the big come-ons.

The order of the words varies, but beer and ice are always

two of the top four staples for sale. If we were all taking care of ourselves,

wouldn't the convenience stores compete for our dollars

with signs that read "Fruit, Vegetables, Bread, Milk"?

Bernie Siegel

Ah, my first 'real' cold since I retired.  I've had little 'hit and miss' ones, but this one has turned out to be a doozy.  I've been taking Coricidin because of my blood pressure issues, but it is not doing much to unplug the old sinuses.  I hate it when I have to breathe through my mouth.  Well, this morning I meet with my new doctor and perhaps he can suggest something.  And, at least, I will get a prescription for my blood pressure meds...although, that is something I want to bring up with him as well. 

 For awhile now I have been suffering from the worst muscle spasms.  Never know where they are going to occur, and all I have to do is move slightly and whatever muscle is effected goes into a painful spasm.  It happens especially with my toes at night when I go to bed. Sometimes my fingers actually lock which makes it difficult to carry an umbrella because I tend to grip it too tight.

I did some research awhile and read that the water pill can cause muscle spasms because along with the excess water in your body, you also lose vital minerals such as sodium and potassium as well.  To offset, I am sure to eat a banana daily, take my Krill oil daily since I don't like seafood, eat a yogurt daily for calcium, and drink lots and lots of water.  I also take Slow Mag, B Complex along with a Multi, and Turmeric.   All this has helped tremendously, but has not cured.  I am still subject so spasms on occasion, but thankfully not every day anymore.  In these two weeks since I have been out of medication, I've not had one muscle cramp. Sometimes I find it too good to believe and try to bring one on.  Nothing.  

Sadly it is one of those 'damned if you do and damned if you don't' situations. If I don't take the meds, I open myself up to all kinds of issues; if I do take them, I have to deal with the cramping.  What is one to do?  There is one water pill I read about that doesn't deplete the potassium.  I'll ask the doctor about that.

So, the pension fiasco continues.  I called yesterday because I haven't received the promised form in the mail.  I was told it was sent out, "but I'll send out another one just to make sure it hasn't been lost."  There is something all too family about that response.  I get it each time they are supposed to send me a form. I'm sorry, but I wasn't born yesterday.  They can't ALL be lost. 

Meanwhile, SNAP (food stamps) had scheduled a phone interview for me yesterday between 12:30 pm and 4:30 pm.  Did they call?  Of course not.  Nothing ever seems to go easy for me.  But, just let me have missed an appointment.  How quickly they would have turned me down.

Well, have to get ready to head to my appointment.  I am looking forward to meeting him.  It felt good to get a call yesterday reminding me that I had an appointment.  At least I don't have to write this new doctor a letter to get one.

Hope you all have a great day. 

The witch doctor succeeds for the same reason all the rest of us succeed. Each patient carries his or her own doctor inside him or her.
They come to us not knowing that truth. We are at our best when

we give the doctor who resides within each patient a chance to go to work.

Albert Schweitzer

Monday Morning This and That

The pure air and dazzling snow belong to things beyond the reach of all personal feeling, almost beyond the reach of life. Yet such things are a part of our life, neither the least noble nor the most terrible.

Frederick Soddy

And a happy Monday morning to all of you. Happy it is, indeed. The huge snowstorm they had predicted last week was a flop. We did get some snow during the night, but it could have been much worse.  I am up to my ears in snow this year. Spring will be enthusiastically welcomed this year.

On Saturday I took a walk to the fruit stand.  Bought myself a magnificent pineapple.  That is my new addiction.  Every night after dinner I have to have about four or five pieces.  Also bought some strawberries, grapes, and the ingredients for a nice, healthy salad.  It was a pretty treacherous walk, but the shopping cart actually helped to keep me steady on the ice.  Wish they would start ticketing people who don't shovel, especially businesses.  Until they do, people will just keep doing it.

There is a lady in the neighborhood who feeds the birds.  Hundreds of pigeons, seagulls, and little birds appear when she comes around. Sometimes there are so many that they block out the sun.   I just caught the tail end of it as I was returning home.  Pretty much the seagulls were all that was left.  It really is quite a sight.  Here we are in the dead of winter, ice all over the ground, and the birds of summer hovering over your head. 

Anyone catch the Beatles special last night?  I would have preferred a documentary with the Beatles singing their own songs, but I enjoyed it, especially when they showed their first appearance on the Ed Sullivan show.  That immediately brought a smile to my face and opened the door to a fond memory.  I remember that night clearly.  Mom and I were glued to the television, eagerly awaiting their arrival.  We were so excited.  What really made it special for me was that it was one of the few times in my life that I remember mom and I being close.

I started re-reading the entire 'Mists of Avalon' series.  It has been several years now.  This time I am starting at the beginning with 'The Fall of Atlantis'.  The last time I was so fascinated with the the karmic tie which linked together the of characters  from one book to the other in a time span which starting from the fall of Atlantis to the time of King Arthur. Totally love these books. Here are a few of my favorite quotes that I had jotted down in my quote notebook.... 

“They have not forgotten the Mysteries,' she said, ‘they have found them too difficult. They want a God who will care for them, who will not demand that they struggle for enlightenment, but who will accept them just as they are, with all their sins, and take away their sins with repentance. It is not so, it will never be so, but perhaps it is the only way the unenlightened can bear to think of their Gods.'

 Lancelot smiled bitterly. ‘Perhaps a religion which demands that every man must work though lifetime after lifetime for his own salvation is too much for mankind. They want not to wait for God's justice but to see it now. And that is the lure which this new breed of priests has promised them.'

Morgaine knew that he spoke truth, and bowed her head in anguish. ‘And since their view of a God is what shapes their reality, so it shall be–the Goddess was real while mankind still paid homage to her, and created her form for themselves. Now they will make for themselves the kind of God they think they want–the kind of God they deserve, perhaps.'

Well, so it must be, for as man saw reality, so it became.” 

from 'The Mists of Avalon'

 Of all things we mortals are called upon to do, the most difficult is forgiveness; in order to truly do it, you will probably have to behave as if you already have forgiven for quite a while before you have actually done so.” 

from 'Ancestors of Avalon'

“Remain true to yourself, child. If you know your own heart, you will always have one friend who does not lie.” 

from  'The Forest House'

 “I never left you; I never will leave you. While life lasts, and beyond, I am here.” 

  from 'Lady of Avalon'

Friday Roundup

Well, another Friday has rolled around.  Weather-wise, it hasn't been the best of weeks. Amazing the amount of storms we had this winter. And now another one on the way.  Hoping that it changes course and leaves us with the minimum amount of snow.  I did go to the Center yesterday.  Only a handful of people were there. It WAS still pretty icy out.  There wasn't enough people for bingo so the intern held a small reminisce group. We spoke about the things we did in the snow when we were children, times when snow was fun and not something to fear.

So, what did I accomplish this week?  Actually, not much of anything.  The weather held me back from meeting with the social worker to discuss the appeal for my penalty.  I also didn't get a chance to apply for free legal services that are available to help me fight these pension woes. As time goes on, and they find more and more reasons not to pay me MY money, I have begun thinking about asking for compensation for all they have put me through.  The emotional turmoil has been taking its toll, and I believe they should pay for it. I know that is a pipe dream, though.  To do so I would have had to be seeing a doctor, and I haven't been.  But, that is just a thought.

Wednesday wasn't a complete flop.  I applied for food stamps.  Discovered that one can apply on line and then get a telephone interview so I figured 'what the heck', and I went for it.  I really hadn't had much hopes about receiving benefits, or if I did, receiving next to nothing, because I was about $25 over the limit.  But, then I did some research and discovered that they have raised the income limit.  Keeping my fingers crossed here.  That will be a big help.

So, what is on my plate this weekend?  To be honest, not much.  Saturday I will probably head to the market and the fruit stand to stock up...just in case we are snowed in....again.  Sunday morning I hope to attend Church. I don't pay much attention to the religious doctrine.  Instead I look to the past and the spirituality that the ancients attached to the various rites and practices.  Speaking of spirituality....

Recently I read a wonderful book on Celtic spirituality, 'Water from an Ancient Well: Celtic Spirituality for Modern Life' by  Kenneth McIntosh. Here are a few quotes from the book.

From "Water from an Ancient Well": 

"When we begin to perceive life flowing together in a continuous sacramental stream, even the passage of time can serve to remind us of our connection to God. Scripture tells us 'There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven' (Ecclesiastes 3:1). Living in our technologically advanced age, however, we sometimes ignore the changing seasons. We create artificial environments for ourselves, and in winter, we simply turn up the heat, while in summer, we crank up the air conditioning. Riding a bike to work—or walking somewhere daily—gives us opportunities to appreciate the seasons anew, but even the view outside our windows, the changing patterns of sunlight and darkness, snow and rain, leaves and bare branches, can all remind us that larger forces are constantly at work in the world beyond our small realms."

 "The ancient Celts felt a sense of longing—almost of homesickness—for the spiritual realm, and they often expressed that yearning in terms of thirst. They regarded wells, lakes, and rivers as “thin places,” gateways to other realms where they experienced magical healing. . . . When the Celts were introduced to Christ, they discovered . . . further reasons to associate spiritual blessings with flowing waters."

For the ancient Celts—both pagan and Christian—circles were important spiritual concepts, as well as the shape of their physical dwellings. In incantation or in prayer, the caim (spiritual circle) was an important means of supernatural protection. The full moon was also a caim—a sacred circle endowed with spiritual protective power—as was the mightier blazing sun. In the Celts’ minds, the circular rath that provided physical security would have had an obvious and natural connection with the symbolic circle of spiritual protection provided by magic or prayer.
And in all these cases, the circle itself was only a vessel for the real source of security: relationships with kin and kindred cosmic forces.

 The ancient Celts opened their hearts to the living creatures with whom they shared their lives, allowing God to speak to them through dog and horse, bird and deer. They were humble enough, joyous enough, curious enough, and loving enough to see animals in a way many of us have forgotten. Like St. Bonaventure, they knew that "every creature is a divine word that proclaims God." For them, as for Thomas a Kempis, each animal was "a mirror of life." May we too learn to see as clearly!

A truly wonderful book.  If you get a chance, check it out.

Have a great weekend.  See you all on Monday.

Wise Words

Yesterday was a totally yukky day.  Even the courtyard was a mass of ice. I didn't even venture up front where it is always worse. The courtyard is not the greatest scenery to look out upon, and I would love to have trees and flowers, but I think back to the old place and am thankful that I at least have windows now.  I told hubby that this really would have been a rough winter for me if I was still working.  I could only take off so many days.  

This morning they were warning people that it was dangerous and that they should stay in if possible.  Yet, they keep the schools open.  If the kids are kept home, they are marked absent. I never have figured that one out.

But, nonetheless, today is a better day, and I am about to get ready to head to the shelter.  I've been in far too long.  Talk to you all tomorrow.

 

 

 A wise old owl sat on an oak,

The more he saw the less he spoke;
The less he spoke the more he heard;
Why aren't we like that wise old bird?

Edward Hersey Richards

There is a wise being living inside of you. It is your intuitive self.
Focus your awareness into a deep place in your body, a place where
your "gut feelings" reside. You can communicate with it by silently
talking to it, making requests, or asking questions. Then relax,
don't think too hard with your mind, and be open to receiving answers.
They are usually very simple and relate to the present moment,
not the past or the future, and they feel right.

Shakti Gawain

You must learn day by day, year by year, to broaden your horizon. The more things you love, the more you are interested in, the more you enjoy, the more you are indignant about--the more you have left when anything happens.

Ethel Barrymore

The wisdom in the story of the most educated and powerful person
is often not greater than the wisdom in the story of a child,
and the life of a child can teach us as much as the life of a sage.

Rachel Naomi Remen

We do not receive wisdom--
we must discover it
for ourselves, after
a journey through the
wilderness which no one
else can make for us,
which no one can spare
us, for our wisdom is
the point of view from
which we come at last
to regard the world.

Marcel Proust

 

Again?????

Nature looks dead in winter because her life is gathered into her heart. She withers the plant down to the root that she may grow it up again fairer and stronger. She calls her family together within her inmost home to prepare them for being scattered abroad upon the face of the earth. 

 Hugh Macmillan

 "Rejuvenescence," 

The Ministry of Nature, 1871

This is the winter that doesn't want to go away.  Every once in awhile it will throw in a tease, only to come back with a vengeance...and this time, it definitely came back with a vengeance.  Ice is pelting the AC this morning.  If it all holds true, it will be three winter storms in a week, and Sunday's storm looks to be a doozy.  So far, they are counting it in feet, not inches.  

Today  I plan to stay in. Way too slippery out there this morning. On Monday, determined not to become a shut-in again, I struggled and made my way to the Center.  It was open, yes, but there was no one there.  Not even enough people to get a Bingo game together.  All we did is gather in one of the television rooms and watch game shows.  I could have done that at home and stayed dry.  So, today I will just stay in and relax...again.  I'll make some barbecue sauce and toss some ribs in the oven, mash some garlic potatoes, and cook up a veggie.  Tomorrow I should be able to get out again.  

My concern is the next storm.  If it's like they say, I'll be housebound for a week.  Hopefully it just blows over.  I've my doctor's appointment on Tuesday morning, and I really don't want to miss it.  Despite eating healthy, I NEED my medication.  Too much is going on right now for me to alleviate all stress,  and I have to do whatever I can to keep my blood pressure down.  

I am thankful, though, that this time I have a computer to keep me occupied.  I'll not be cut off from my friends with nothing to do but worry like I did the last time.  I can take the course I was interested in, check in with my friends, and play my computer games.  And, just knowing that Spring is around the corner makes it all the more bearable. 

Don't get me wrong.  I actually LOVE winter. I would love to lie down and make a snow angel or have a snowball fight with a friend.  I enjoy bundling up and feeling the crisp, cold air against my face.  Winter has a clean smell. There is a freshness that abounds.  And, I have so many fond memories of the snow, but now, as I grow older, I fear it.  I fear slipping on an icy patch, and despite the law, people just don't shovel like they should.

Oh, gosh, I have to tell you this one.  I found a new cure-all.  Last night I woke in the middle of the night with shoulder pain. When one grows older there is always an ache or pain somewhere.  I couldn't sleep.  Tossed and turned, and no matter how I lay, that shoulder hurt.  So I got up and made my way into the bathroom.  I know where the pain creams are kept so I didn't even turn on the light.  I just grabbed one and rubbed it on.  It stung a wee bit when it hit my skin, but I didn't think anything of it.  Besides, it took the pain away.

So, I went back to bed and slept for a few more hours.   When I got up, I went into the bathroom to splash some water on my face.  As I reached for my towel, I glanced at the shelf and discovered that the pain cream I had rubbed on was actually the new toothpaste that hubby had bought for his dentures.  What can I say?  It worked. 

Everyone have a great day. Be safe.

Winter, a lingering season, is a time to gather golden moments,

embark upon a sentimental journey, and enjoy every idle hour.

John Boswell

What is it with These People??????

I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once.  

Jennifer Yane

More snow yesterday, and according to the forecast, at least two more storms expected in the next seven days.  Whew!!!! What a winter this has been. And, just when I was getting out and about.  Determined not to become a hermit, I decided to give it a shot yesterday and go to the Center.  Big mistake.  Not only was it slippery, cold and wet, but NO ONE was there.  I discovered that I am not the only oldster that chooses not to weather the storm.  It was actually quite boring, but lunch was fantastic...baked chicken, mashed potatoes, and broccoli, and because the place was fairly empty, the portions were huge.

So, when I got home from the Center, there was a letter waiting for me from the Union.  Oh, how my spirits rose!  'Finally,' I thought, 'this nightmare is over', but soon I discovered that I have entered a nightmare that never seems to end.  It seems now that 'we are working as hard as we can to expedite your pension, but we need another form....blah, blah, blah...'  This time it is something called a W4-P.  It is supposedly a tax form for pensions.  Well, why wasn't it included in the original application?  I didn't misplace it.  Now that hubby has his award letter from SSD, he can apply for an early pension.  They sent him no less than 9 applications.  Every day there is a new one in the mail.  I went through all of them, and none had a W4-P enclosed.  That's how they get you.  They don't enclose these forms, not even when they write to tell you they are missing. No, you have to call and THEN they send it...all time consuming.

For several months now I have been calling for follow-ups at least bi-weekly and since December, every Friday...and not one person mentioned it.  Why are they doing this to me?  It's not like it is a ton of money.  I am only entitled to $290 per month, but along with my social security, it is enough to live on.  Without it, I end up paying out more than I bring in. I've never needed to be wealthy.  All I want is a roof over my head and food on the table.  

I couldn't help myself. I called and went off on them...something I really didn't want to do.  Not because they didn't deserve it, but I am trying to keep my stress level down because I procrastinated about making my doctor's appointment too long.  Whatever made me do that, I don't know, but now, I only have four days of blood pressure medication and my appointment is not until February 11th. The receptionist was very nice.  She said if I had any problems to call, and she would squeeze me in.

Meanwhile, I've been using foods and supplements to keep my blood pressure in check. There was a time when I used alternative medicine and diet on a regular basis.  I remember one time, many years ago, I came down with a bladder infection. The doctor gave me a prescription for one pill.  ONE PILL.  It had to be strong to knock out an infection, so I refused to take it.  Instead, I drank cranberry juice and cleared it up.  Throughout the years all my healthy habits have given way to junk foods and, on occasion, medications.  Time to get back to natural ways. Some foods that I have been eating that help to lower blood pressure are:

Strawberries

 Broccoli 

 Avocado

 Yogurt

Spinach

Beets

Bananas

Green tea

Kiwi Fruit 

Walnuts

Supplements I take besides a good multi mineral include:

Cider Vinegar tablets

Calcium and Magnesium supplement
Kyolic Garlic

Krill Oil

The Krill Oil is actually expensive, but I don't like fish or seafood, and fish oil pills repeat on me.  Krill Oil is more potent and has no aftertaste.  Same goes for the Kyolic Garlic. But, if one cannot control stress, none of it is going to work. 

Every day we touch what is wrong, and, as a result, we are becoming less and less healthy. That is why we have to learn to practice touching what is not wrong—inside us and around us. When we get in touch with our eyes, our heart, our liver, our breathing, and our non-toothache and really enjoy them, we see that the conditions for peace and happiness are already present. 

Thich Nhat Hanh

Monday Morning This and That

"If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant."

  Anne Bradstreet

As Monday morning rolls around I find that each day I move closer to feeling my old normal self.  Last week I was really busy, and after sitting in and moping for so long, it felt so good to have my energy and enthusiasm returning.  The snow and ice had pretty much melted, and the temperatures stabilized for a bit so I took advantage of the situation and  made it to the Center three times last week, did my food shopping, and all of my banking.  Bills have been paid, and we enter the month of February filled with hope. The weather this weekend was fantastic. It was so springlike.  What a perfect weekend to celebrate Imbolc.

Since Imbolc is a time of new beginnings, I spent most of the afternoon clearing out some of the old things that were no longer needed and did nothing but clutter my home and my life.  I bagged up the old clothes, the costume jewelry I had outgrown, and some of my household knicknacks and took them to the dropbox. It seems that as much as I declutter, there is always more that has to go. (Sigh) How did I get so much stuff?  Years of refusing to 'let go' is the answer. 

Later, I freshened up my altar.  Mine is not your usual altar.  It contains my collection of Mary's, Mary Magdalene, Our Lady of Lourdes, white candles, a piece of jade, Holy Water, precious stones, a goddess paperweight,  and the Dove of Peace.  Later I planted some mint.  That's a pretty easy herb to grow. 

Of course, we had a feast.  Lamb is a traditional Imbolc dish, but it is priced out of my range, so instead, I made garlic pork chops, baked potato with sour cream (sour cream symbolizes the ewes lactating milk), fresh brocolli, beets, and for desert, strawberries with whipped cream. 

 I must say, these were the sweetest strawberries I have ever tasted. (Yes, I did get a wee bit carried away with the whipped cream, but it is something I cannot resist.)

Sunday morn I headed out to Church where they celebrated 'The Presentation of Jesus at the Temple".  This day is also known as Candlemas.  The service began with a candle-lit procession followed by a blessing of the candles.  They even chose my favorite hymn for the procession, "All the Ends of the Earth". I wish I could record that man's voice for you.  When he sings, the hairs on my arm actually stand up. It was a lovely service.  When I went home, I baked some Irish soda bread in honor of the goddess, Brighid.  It's the first time I made it in 30 years.  Can't believe it has been that long. I enjoyed it, but hubby is not too fond of raisins. 

Later it was preparation for the coming week--laying out clothes, nails, shampoo--followed by some quiet time for reading....which brings us to this morning....

... And so we come to this morning. SNOW????? Again?  What's up with that?   

Still lie the sheltering snows, undimmed and white;

And reigns the winter's pregnant silence still;

No sign of spring, save that the catkins fill,

And willow stems grow daily red and bright.

These are days when ancients held a rite

Of expiation for the old year's ill,

And prayer to purify the new year's will.

  Helen Hunt Jackson

'A Calendar of Sonnet's: February'